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My step son and I got into it today

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All in the parenting....the 18yo seems like it went ok, the other one, just needs a different approach, he may be handling the situation differently than the 18yo. *** whoopings have their place but, most people do that because its easier than thinking it through and figuring out something different. Mine are 23 and 15, after the first one, I've learned its all in the word choice and how it is presented and the choices given, in 15 years I still have yet to feel the need to beat my sons *** for something. He is either smart enough to avoid the stupidity or he owns his mistakes and feels bad for them, admits the wrong in it and learns from it. *** whoopings teach nothing. I have a dumbass relative that can back that up. He still does stupid things knowingly, always had his *** beat the most of all of us. The parent(s) have to set everyone up for success, that's our job!
 
My step son Matt and I got into it today.We do get along,he does things that do get me angry.One is he doesn't clean up messes up and I am on him for it.I come home from work,leaves a mess in my stall in my side of the garage.5 empty oil bottles,drain oil container full of oil and a wrench of mine he borrowed all oily.Changed the oil in his car.16 years old thinking I am his maid cleaning up his mess.I find him in his room playing video games.He got mad at me shutting it off telling him clean his mess in the garage on my side.Told me that was my job and told him it wasn't.Turned into an argument,my husband found out what he did and we got him to clean it up.Even wiped off that wrench off putting it away.Took his video games and not getting them back for 2 weeks.He did come up to apologize to me later on,learned his lesson and forgave him.

You did him a big favor. Feel sorry for the kids whose parents just pacify and coddle.

Glad he took the initiative to change his own oil. Maybe he’ll turn out ok after all.

:thumbsup:
 
I remember when I was 16 I was the same way.
Got a good yelling at when I was 16 but got my butt beat when younger.....

Spending the amount of time I did with my grandparents taught me a great deal about respecting my elders...no to mention work ethic. At 16 I was living on my own, still in school and a part time job to pay my way.

Different era I suppose.
Yup....don't know how old you are but I was out mowing yards at 12 then working with my dad building houses at 14.....because of getting into too much trouble when I was 13 lol. The last straw was at the end of the previous summer and dad said I would be going to work with him next summer and he kept his word. He did pay me for working though....

Your right. I would have had my *** beat for that. I leave my shop a mess sometimes but its mine and eventually its clean, but its mine. I already have my 3 year old hanging wrenches, she loves helping me in the shop, but jobs take 10 times longer but it's worth it. He'll eventually realize how lucky he has it, I know it took me a while and a few knocks.
A buddy's son has a 5 year old that's doing the same thing! Hope he hangs in there and continues. My younger daughter liked going to the drag strip until she turned 12 and then didn't want to go anymore. Turns out she just wanted to go because she thought all the 'colors' were cool to look at. Artsy kid.....

I was glad to see that he came around and apologized in the end. However, I'm also impressed that he's changing his own oil...not every sixteen year old would care to.

It was great when you could get away with it, ........or at least till dad got home.

Lol, I think "the" video game back around 16 looked something like this...….
View attachment 749407
That pic made me laugh!! And I heard my mom tell me many times "wait until your dad gets home!!"

All in the parenting....the 18yo seems like it went ok, the other one, just needs a different approach, he may be handling the situation differently than the 18yo. *** whoopings have their place but, most people do that because its easier than thinking it through and figuring out something different. Mine are 23 and 15, after the first one, I've learned its all in the word choice and how it is presented and the choices given, in 15 years I still have yet to feel the need to beat my sons *** for something. He is either smart enough to avoid the stupidity or he owns his mistakes and feels bad for them, admits the wrong in it and learns from it. *** whoopings teach nothing. I have a dumbass relative that can back that up. He still does stupid things knowingly, always had his *** beat the most of all of us. The parent(s) have to set everyone up for success, that's our job!
My youngest responded positively to 'butt burnings' lol. Actually, it was very structured and not very hard at all but it was mainly the process of it that got to her. We tried everything else in the book first and none of it worked! It was getting nuts and had to do something different and I'm so glad that it got her attention and it only took her a few times. I got the butt burnings too as a kid and there there times where it happened 3 days in a row and it didn't do much for me but there was absolutely no structure to it....just one pissed off parent that went nuts on me and I promised myself that I would never ever act like that and didn't!
 
Batman bitch slap.jpg
 
My step son Matt and I got into it today.We do get along,he does things that do get me angry.One is he doesn't clean up messes up and I am on him for it.I come home from work,leaves a mess in my stall in my side of the garage.5 empty oil bottles,drain oil container full of oil and a wrench of mine he borrowed all oily.Changed the oil in his car.16 years old thinking I am his maid cleaning up his mess.I find him in his room playing video games.He got mad at me shutting it off telling him clean his mess in the garage on my side.Told me that was my job and told him it wasn't.Turned into an argument,my husband found out what he did and we got him to clean it up.Even wiped off that wrench off putting it away.Took his video games and not getting them back for 2 weeks.He did come up to apologize to me later on,learned his lesson and forgave him.
Sounds normal for many teenage kids. Stating it was your job was very rude.
But why come here and write about it?
 
When my son wanted to work on his car in the garage. I gave the go ahead. When it was a mess. I cleaned it up the first time. The second time around. He asked I said sure. But I went out and helped but this time I through his tools on the floor in the oil and dirt. He asked why I did that. I told him. You want to spend time making a mess and then you can find your tools in that mess. Clean up your mess and pickup your tools. The next time .they go in the trash. a rental bay shop will gladly take your money for a rented bay. And they will charge you for the clean up.

My dad just said nope. You are not working in the garage there were nno options
 
Sounds normal for many teenage kids. Stating it was your job was very rude.
But why come here and write about it?


Apparently because she doesn't get enough attention at home or at school where she claims to be an inspiring principal while simultaneously being excited about her Big Rig Boss giving her more to do at the diesel shop while expanding the minds of young ladies with the Big Sisters program. I'm surprised she has time to even share all of these adventures with us here.

Eye Roll.jpg
 
Once upon a time I helped a poor black child that later on became a rich white woman....and then she forgot all about little old poor me :(
 
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