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Found this while looking at old cars on the net. Too funny.
1%ers Disclaimer
And no one percenters, no, I don't mean the rich 1% you hear about on the news, the other end of the spectrum 1%... What I mean is, 99% of eBayers are intelligent, reasonable, level headed, swap meet, flea market, estate sale, thrift shop, 2nd hand, trade show, antique mall, restoration, bargain hunting loving shoppers who appreciate the value as much as the hunt and the experience; while at the same time being able to artfully balance that with the realization that the item they are buying is used, old and may have idiosyncrasies to match, and they not only appreciate that, but embrace it as part of the items individual character and charm!
The one percent, on the other hand, are the biggest cheapskates that can be, and yet they somehow think eBay is Macie's (or in the case of most the items I sell, the factory dealership), and after low balling you, will moan and cry about any and every real or perceived thing they can find because they do not have the discerning wisdom to read between the lines of the obvious reality in the listing, because every little thing has to be spelled out for them, and if its not they will accuse you as a seller of being dishonest because they don't have the intelligence to understand the unstated obvious.
So...if you are a one percenter, this is for you.
The item is as pictured and described, but it may be between 30 and 80+ years old and may look like the came out of Oscar the Grouches residence, being dusty/dirty, perhaps even having Charlotte's web inside, feasting on dead flies. They probably came from abandoned vehicles in ungodly locations, which means, they were left to the elements and rarely moved, so sun fading, wind chapping and who knows what else may have occurred. When they were moved, they were drug by chains and tow straps, or pushed by tractors(with a tire between them if they were careful) by tired dirty farmers who just wanted to get the vehicle out of their way. So by purchasing, the buyer acknowledges he has received pictures of all items, has seen they are rusty, dented, dinged, pitted, peeling, fading, cracking, torn, deteriorated, smelly, dirty, bug and web infested used parts off of old vehicles that were abandoned to the elements and may even have the afore mentioned damage/rust/etc. that may not have been visible as with personal inspection, however, buyer has inspected pictures to their satisfaction, calculated their fitment and application, and has negotiated prices on these parts. No returns, guarantees, warrantees, charge backs, or refunds have been expressed or implied. All said, the buyer realizes if I'm selling it, its nothing short of a miracle the item being purchased made it this far!
Are we clear?
So no whiners!
Furthermore, I am not Sax 5th Ave, Nordstrom, Macie's, JC Penny's, Sears, Napa, Auto Zone, the local car dealership, or even Amazon, which means your item will not come with a card, a bow, ribbon, tissue paper, pillow box, or even a new box...for your purchase, I will not be going to the UPS store to buy a new $4 box, I will be rummaging through the 20x20 room devoted to storing boxes upstairs in my metal grinding dirty, weld smoky, primer sanding dusty, paint overspray shop where I restore cars(and anything else I can find that is old and cool), the boxes will have been used to ship items at the very least once, but more than likely they will have been used so many times to ship that if they had frequent flier miles they would have earned a free trip around the world. Also, if its a corrugated box its fair game, which means the boxes may be old beer/wine/liquor boxes(from coping with the 1%ers), oil boxes, or from misc small appliances/tools; and may have been previously used to store parts, pack tools, or even as a temporary table to hold items during the primer/paint process of automotive restoration. Which means, if the boxes still somewhat resemble a rectangle, no matter their painted color, or previous use, they are fair game to ship your item. The same goes for packaging material, I will not be going to Upscale Mail to purchase new packing peanuts for $3, which means for packaging material you can expect, depending on the item shipped and my current packaging supply; old crumpled Harbor Freight tools ads, news paper, construction materials packaging, including but not limited to, cardboard, paper, plastic, plastic bags, old broken styrofoam from tool packaging, empty water bottles, my old sweaty T shirts, old insulation, straw bales, tumbleweeds, dandelion fluff, or anything else I deem acceptable by my discernment to reasonably get the item to you in one piece, through the shippers "drop ship" attitude.
Now I proudly affront the 1%ers with the spirit of a puffed chested
Weird Al Yankovic singing Superhero eBay Pooowwwweeerrrr Seelllleeerrrr!
Fighting for reasonableness & discernment in purchasing old junque' for all!
'(*_*)'
~~<(P)>
_/ \_
1%ers Disclaimer
And no one percenters, no, I don't mean the rich 1% you hear about on the news, the other end of the spectrum 1%... What I mean is, 99% of eBayers are intelligent, reasonable, level headed, swap meet, flea market, estate sale, thrift shop, 2nd hand, trade show, antique mall, restoration, bargain hunting loving shoppers who appreciate the value as much as the hunt and the experience; while at the same time being able to artfully balance that with the realization that the item they are buying is used, old and may have idiosyncrasies to match, and they not only appreciate that, but embrace it as part of the items individual character and charm!
The one percent, on the other hand, are the biggest cheapskates that can be, and yet they somehow think eBay is Macie's (or in the case of most the items I sell, the factory dealership), and after low balling you, will moan and cry about any and every real or perceived thing they can find because they do not have the discerning wisdom to read between the lines of the obvious reality in the listing, because every little thing has to be spelled out for them, and if its not they will accuse you as a seller of being dishonest because they don't have the intelligence to understand the unstated obvious.
So...if you are a one percenter, this is for you.
The item is as pictured and described, but it may be between 30 and 80+ years old and may look like the came out of Oscar the Grouches residence, being dusty/dirty, perhaps even having Charlotte's web inside, feasting on dead flies. They probably came from abandoned vehicles in ungodly locations, which means, they were left to the elements and rarely moved, so sun fading, wind chapping and who knows what else may have occurred. When they were moved, they were drug by chains and tow straps, or pushed by tractors(with a tire between them if they were careful) by tired dirty farmers who just wanted to get the vehicle out of their way. So by purchasing, the buyer acknowledges he has received pictures of all items, has seen they are rusty, dented, dinged, pitted, peeling, fading, cracking, torn, deteriorated, smelly, dirty, bug and web infested used parts off of old vehicles that were abandoned to the elements and may even have the afore mentioned damage/rust/etc. that may not have been visible as with personal inspection, however, buyer has inspected pictures to their satisfaction, calculated their fitment and application, and has negotiated prices on these parts. No returns, guarantees, warrantees, charge backs, or refunds have been expressed or implied. All said, the buyer realizes if I'm selling it, its nothing short of a miracle the item being purchased made it this far!
Are we clear?
So no whiners!
Furthermore, I am not Sax 5th Ave, Nordstrom, Macie's, JC Penny's, Sears, Napa, Auto Zone, the local car dealership, or even Amazon, which means your item will not come with a card, a bow, ribbon, tissue paper, pillow box, or even a new box...for your purchase, I will not be going to the UPS store to buy a new $4 box, I will be rummaging through the 20x20 room devoted to storing boxes upstairs in my metal grinding dirty, weld smoky, primer sanding dusty, paint overspray shop where I restore cars(and anything else I can find that is old and cool), the boxes will have been used to ship items at the very least once, but more than likely they will have been used so many times to ship that if they had frequent flier miles they would have earned a free trip around the world. Also, if its a corrugated box its fair game, which means the boxes may be old beer/wine/liquor boxes(from coping with the 1%ers), oil boxes, or from misc small appliances/tools; and may have been previously used to store parts, pack tools, or even as a temporary table to hold items during the primer/paint process of automotive restoration. Which means, if the boxes still somewhat resemble a rectangle, no matter their painted color, or previous use, they are fair game to ship your item. The same goes for packaging material, I will not be going to Upscale Mail to purchase new packing peanuts for $3, which means for packaging material you can expect, depending on the item shipped and my current packaging supply; old crumpled Harbor Freight tools ads, news paper, construction materials packaging, including but not limited to, cardboard, paper, plastic, plastic bags, old broken styrofoam from tool packaging, empty water bottles, my old sweaty T shirts, old insulation, straw bales, tumbleweeds, dandelion fluff, or anything else I deem acceptable by my discernment to reasonably get the item to you in one piece, through the shippers "drop ship" attitude.
Now I proudly affront the 1%ers with the spirit of a puffed chested
Weird Al Yankovic singing Superhero eBay Pooowwwweeerrrr Seelllleeerrrr!
Fighting for reasonableness & discernment in purchasing old junque' for all!
'(*_*)'
~~<(P)>
_/ \_
for sharing that with US Ghost 
