Memories that make you smile or laugh out loud

[kiwigtx]

Quite a few years ago I worked at Marks & Spencer's UK computer centre facility as a maintenance electrician. It was a great learning experience, and I made some great friends there in the two and a half years there before coming home again. Many great times at the two facilities....and some good laughs.

One thing that always makes me smile is one night (around midnight) just after shift change, one of the security guards (Bill) had just finished doing his stock market picks in the papers. He saw me coming across the floor, and while sitting down he tipped back his uniform cap and pretended to play the trombone. Doing his best Glenn Miller impression "In the mood" just absolutely cracked me up. His colleague Dennis just sat quietly and chuckled. We were always doing silly stuff that helped get through those 12-13 hour night shifts.

Another time - a Friday night...heading into a 12 hour shift, my supervisor and I were taking turns at having a nap. My super' was monitoring the BMS with his eyes closed.....and then the fire alarm went off...around 2:00am. There was only about 20 of us in the entire building which held over 400 during the day. As we groggily made our way to the front foyer, we were greeted by about six unhappy looking firemen.....holding axes and breathing gear. They had almost smashed their way through our bullet-proof rotary front doors, when the security guard opened a side door to let them in. They weren't happy because of our appearance.

The computer room manager was wearing a night cap, and slippers, the tape operator was wearing pyjamas, my supervisor had his jacket buttoned up one button out all the way up, and I had a 'scar' up the length of my face from the heavy plastic zip that I had been using as a pillow.
The fire chief guy asked if anyone had actually been awake there at the time. It was a bit tense as a shift report would likely be filed.....luckily there were no consequences the following Monday. Gave us all a bit of a shock at the time. (False alarm - someone forgot to isolate an underfloor smoke head circuit.)

We used a system of clicks on the radio R/T units - instead of blatantly obvious words like (Hey a manager is here on site) ...two, three or four clicks for different meanings.
After a while one guard became quite adept at making the sound of a horse galloping with his fingernails across the radio....hilarious.

What's your stories....please share them.....

 

[Hey-O]

I was a kid working at the hospital as an Orderly, patient transport, in the OR. There was a guard that was always trying to act as if he was the police, Barney Fife, a real pain in the ***. I was bringing a body down to the morgue, or so it looked like it. It was a friend covered up on the gurney. He was in the morgue checking things out, when I rolled in and had him pinned in with the wall and the gurney. We were talking and I could see he was very uncomfortable looking at the sheet with the body under it, when an arm fell out from under the sheet first and my friend sat up!! This guy was about to pass out as he bounced off the wall trying to get to the door screaming.

Two things happened the next day, one, I was told while my boss loved it, NEVER do that again. Two, whenever the guard saw me after that, he scooted off the other way.

 

[kiwigtx]

I was a kid working at the hospital as an Orderly, patient transport, in the OR. There was a guard that was always trying to act as if he was the police, Barney Fife, a real pain in the ***. I was bringing a body down to the morgue, or so it looked like it. It was a friend covered up on the gurney. He was in the morgue checking things out, when I rolled in and had him pinned in with the wall and the gurney. We were talking and I could see he was very uncomfortable looking at the sheet with the body under it, when an arm fell out from under the sheet first and my friend sat up!! This guy was about to pass out as he bounced off the wall trying to get to the door screaming.

Two things happened the next day, one, I was told while my boss loved it, NEVER do that again. Two, whenever the guard saw me after that, he scooted off the other way.

 

[gtx6970]

We were at the Nats several years ago.
We decided we wanted pizza and wings.
So, called the dominos a few blocks away and ordered. They wanted a room number........ We told them just have the driver pull around back in the parking lot , look for a bunch of old fat guys in lawn chairs.

So, as the evening wore on someone in the hotel called the cops. About 10 pm or so a cruiser rolls thru and gives us a little speech, ultimately just smiling , asked about the cool cars and asked us to keep it down a little. Handed him a few wings and he left.

Little while later we decided we needed more wings. SO, we called and ordered up some more. Told them this time look for some DRUNK old fat farts in the parking lot
So, we sat there outside in the parking lot eating pizza and chicken wings and we had consumed A LOT of beer by this time. When the time came we decided we best go to bead. About 1am I think. Hardly a one of us could stand up. Barely able to walk back to the rooms. Fortunately, we didnt have far to go. Otherwise I think one ( most ) of us would have slept in the lawn chair right there in the parking lot.

That nite started a tradition for pizza and beer in the Mopar Nats hotel parking lot that still happens to this day. And that had to be to close to 20 years ago.

The group has grown quite a bit in those years. Sadly, We've lost a couple over the years , Added several. Including 2nd generations now . But for the most part its still the same bunch of friends having a good time.

 

[Dave6T4]

One of the toolmakers at work was quitting to take a job at another shop. This guy was a PITA, and no one was too sad to see him leave. He was always pranking guys, so a couple of guys decided he needed one to see him off. They drilled a small hole in his Kennedy tool box, threaded in a grease zerk, and proceeded to pump as much grease into it as they could.

 

[MarPar]

Quite a few years ago I worked at Marks & Spencer's UK computer centre facility as a maintenance electrician. It was a great learning experience, and I made some great friends there in the two and a half years there before coming home again. Many great times at the two facilities....and some good laughs.

One thing that always makes me smile is one night (around midnight) just after shift change, one of the security guards (Bill) had just finished doing his stock market picks in the papers. He saw me coming across the floor, and while sitting down he tipped back his uniform cap and pretended to play the trombone. Doing his best Glenn Miller impression "In the mood" just absolutely cracked me up. His colleague Dennis just sat quietly and chuckled. We were always doing silly stuff that helped get through those 12-13 hour night shifts.

Another time - a Friday night...heading into a 12 hour shift, my supervisor and I were taking turns at having a nap. My super' was monitoring the BMS with his eyes closed.....and then the fire alarm went off...around 2:00am. There was only about 20 of us in the entire building which held over 400 during the day. As we groggily made our way to the front foyer, we were greeted by about six unhappy looking firemen.....holding axes and breathing gear. They had almost smashed their way through our bullet-proof rotary front doors, when the security guard opened a side door to let them in. They weren't happy because of our appearance.

The computer room manager was wearing a night cap, and slippers, the tape operator was wearing pyjamas, my supervisor had his jacket buttoned up one button out all the way up, and I had a 'scar' up the length of my face from the heavy plastic zip that I had been using as a pillow.
The fire chief guy asked if anyone had actually been awake there at the time. It was a bit tense as a shift report would likely be filed.....luckily there were no consequences the following Monday. Gave us all a bit of a shock at the time. (False alarm - someone forgot to isolate an underfloor smoke head circuit.)

We used a system of clicks on the radio R/T units - instead of blatantly obvious words like (Hey a manager is here on site) ...two, three or four clicks for different meanings.
After a while one guard became quite adept at making the sound of a horse galloping with his fingernails across the radio....hilarious.

What's your stories....please share them.....

 

[MarPar]

I was a kid working at the hospital as an Orderly, patient transport, in the OR. There was a guard that was always trying to act as if he was the police, Barney Fife, a real pain in the ***. I was bringing a body down to the morgue, or so it looked like it. It was a friend covered up on the gurney. He was in the morgue checking things out, when I rolled in and had him pinned in with the wall and the gurney. We were talking and I could see he was very uncomfortable looking at the sheet with the body under it, when an arm fell out from under the sheet first and my friend sat up!! This guy was about to pass out as he bounced off the wall trying to get to the door screaming.

Two things happened the next day, one, I was told while my boss loved it, NEVER do that again. Two, whenever the guard saw me after that, he scooted off the other way.

 

[Kern Dog]

Many of my laughs come from the reactions from others after being pranked.
One job, the guys sort of ganged up on the shop idiot. They would cut his shop broomstick 1 inch each day before he got there. Imagine him stooping forward a little more each day but not understanding why.
I used to love moving stuff that someone put in a spot. I'd move tools, materials, lunch boxes, all sorts of things sometimes just over a couple feet, other times I'd hide them. The guy would come around looking, find nothing, then look somewhere else. I'd then put it back exactly where it was just to mess with the guy.
Billy O was a framer that lost half an index finger when he was a kid. One day at lunch, he had a corn dog but only ate half of it. He peeled the breading off and wiped some ketchup on it and took it back with him to the second floor of the house we were framing. He started his saw and jammed it to the wall so it made a CLANG ! sound. He yelled out as he tossed the "finger" off the floor just as a young kid walked by.
Pick it up! Pick it up!
That was some funny ****.

 

[SlingLow]

I graduated high school in 1978 and instead of moving away from home, my mother did (single parent). She enrolled in the University of Oregon to complete the course work for her PhD. So I'm 18 years old, paying her bills from her checkbook, my rock-and-roll band practicing in the basement and partying. Life was good! One day near the end of summer my buddies and I made plans to go to the high school drags one more time. I pulled my 68 LeMans out on the street, uncapped the headers, put it up on 2 bumper jacks, installed wrinkle walls, and left it there in the air, parked the wrong way on the curb until my buddy brought his trailer in the morning to load it. Well about 9pm we were sitting in the living room bonging out when we were lit up by blues. I looked out the window and saw a Sherrif's cruiser right next to the Pontiac in full array. 'Great', I thought, now I have to go out there stoned and explain that I'm not driving it that way, didn't drive it that way, and I'm trailering it to PIR tomorrow morning for the drags. I walked down the front steps and saw the driver with the Sherrif's jacket with the reflective patches sitting in the driver's seat. I took a few more steps and saw my buddy Todd in the driver's seat wearing the jacket. Todd worked at the local service station that did tuning and other service work for the Sherrif's department. I walked up and asked him what he was doing. He told me he had tuned the cruiser and had it out for a test drive. I asked him why he was wearing the jacket, and he said the cop left it in the car so why not? So 18 year old me said 'well then let's give the neighbors something to talk about (you know they're all watching out the window, right?). Why don't you jump out and rough me up a little?' So Todd jumps out, we struggle, he throws me against the rear quarter and jams my head down on the trunk while he reached over and opened the rear door. He 'threw' me in the back seat (I jumped in), slammed the door, jumped in and did a class A burnout down the street to the stop sign 6 houses down. Without another word he said' I have to go back to work now'. I jumped out and said, 'no worries, I'll walk home.' I always expected Mom to ask me about that night but she never did. Sometimes it's best for the neighbors to mind their own business.

 

[kiwigtx]

I graduated high school in 1978 and instead of moving away from home, my mother did (single parent). She enrolled in the University of Oregon to complete the course work for her PhD. So I'm 18 years old, paying her bills from her checkbook, my rock-and-roll band practicing in the basement and partying. Life was good! One day near the end of summer my buddies and I made plans to go to the high school drags one more time. I pulled my 68 LeMans out on the street, uncapped the headers, put it up on 2 bumper jacks, installed wrinkle walls, and left it there in the air, parked the wrong way on the curb until my buddy brought his trailer in the morning to load it. Well about 9pm we were sitting in the living room bonging out when we were lit up by blues. I looked out the window and saw a Sherrif's cruiser right next to the Pontiac in full array. 'Great', I thought, now I have to go out there stoned and explain that I'm not driving it that way, didn't drive it that way, and I'm trailering it to PIR tomorrow morning for the drags. I walked down the front steps and saw the driver with the Sherrif's jacket with the reflective patches sitting in the driver's seat. I took a few more steps and saw my buddy Todd in the driver's seat wearing the jacket. Todd worked at the local service station that did tuning and other service work for the Sherrif's department. I walked up and asked him what he was doing. He told me he had tuned the cruiser and had it out for a test drive. I asked him why he was wearing the jacket, and he said the cop left it in the car so why not? So 18 year old me said 'well then let's give the neighbors something to talk about (you know they're all watching out the window, right?). Why don't you jump out and rough me up a little?' So Todd jumps out, we struggle, he throws me against the rear quarter and jams my head down on the trunk while he reached over and opened the rear door. He 'threw' me in the back seat (I jumped in), slammed the door, jumped in and did a class A burnout down the street to the stop sign 6 houses down. Without another word he said' I have to go back to work now'. I jumped out and said, 'no worries, I'll walk home.' I always expected Mom to ask me about that night but she never did. Sometimes it's best for the neighbors to mind their own business.

That is hilarious.....love it. Great story.

 

[1STMP]

Quite a few years ago I worked at Marks & Spencer's UK computer centre facility as a maintenance electrician. It was a great learning experience, and I made some great friends there in the two and a half years there before coming home again. Many great times at the two facilities....and some good laughs.

One thing that always makes me smile is one night (around midnight) just after shift change, one of the security guards (Bill) had just finished doing his stock market picks in the papers. He saw me coming across the floor, and while sitting down he tipped back his uniform cap and pretended to play the trombone. Doing his best Glenn Miller impression "In the mood" just absolutely cracked me up. His colleague Dennis just sat quietly and chuckled. We were always doing silly stuff that helped get through those 12-13 hour night shifts.

Another time - a Friday night...heading into a 12 hour shift, my supervisor and I were taking turns at having a nap. My super' was monitoring the BMS with his eyes closed.....and then the fire alarm went off...around 2:00am. There was only about 20 of us in the entire building which held over 400 during the day. As we groggily made our way to the front foyer, we were greeted by about six unhappy looking firemen.....holding axes and breathing gear. They had almost smashed their way through our bullet-proof rotary front doors, when the security guard opened a side door to let them in. They weren't happy because of our appearance.

The computer room manager was wearing a night cap, and slippers, the tape operator was wearing pyjamas, my supervisor had his jacket buttoned up one button out all the way up, and I had a 'scar' up the length of my face from the heavy plastic zip that I had been using as a pillow.
The fire chief guy asked if anyone had actually been awake there at the time. It was a bit tense as a shift report would likely be filed.....luckily there were no consequences the following Monday. Gave us all a bit of a shock at the time. (False alarm - someone forgot to isolate an underfloor smoke head circuit.)

We used a system of clicks on the radio R/T units - instead of blatantly obvious words like (Hey a manager is here on site) ...two, three or four clicks for different meanings.
After a while one guard became quite adept at making the sound of a horse galloping with his fingernails across the radio....hilarious.

What's your stories....please share them.....

Not being able to physically
move was frightening. Like
being claustropobic but no
solid walls to confine your
movements.
I hit a tree on a snowmobile
at nearly 70 mph.
I woke up wondering where
the hell I was. It was bright,
but couldn't gage the temp,
nor did I feel any pain.
(was told later I'd spent a
day and a half buried in
a snowbank).
There was a flurry of activity
as docs and nurses were
stabilizing my ailments.
When things calmed down,
I was wheeled away on the
gourney to x-ray....3 flights
up.
A young (my age) candy
striper (nurses assistant)
applied the mobility, at the
head of the gourney. Well
endowed and aware.
They were inches from my
face. A natural reaction
occured, though I don't
know how. I couldn't feel
a damned thing, much less
move.
She noticed the tent in the
hospital gown, and with no
hesitation, reached in the
gourney tray for a bottle
of macurichrome. The
bright red orange stuff.
Three guesses where it was
applied.
2 more flights up with docs
and nurses getting on and
off the elevator...
The comments forever
implanted. (all words of
encouragement) but one
could tell the situation.
I attribute my drive to
learning how to walk again
to that very space in time,
and that candy stripers
sense of humor.
Her name was Cindy.

 

[Triplegreen500]

Principal's office in high school faced due east. Buddy of mine and I had a key to the school...so one night we covered every surface in his office with tin foil. Shelves. Books. Furniture. Pens. Stapler. And left the blinds open. He called us in right after first bell. We showed up in sunglasses...."yeah, I figured it was you..."

We also built a squareback vw in the cafeteria one night.

Filled the soda machines with beer (4th period freshman lunch was a free for all that day!).

In college, we were in Key West in my satellite wagon. Like, eleven of us in the wagon, coming back from Duval St. This was...'94, I think. I was driving, 3 friends next to me on the bench, 4 on the back seat, everyone else in the trunk. I look in the mirror, and Dave is sound asleep in the middle of the back seat. I mean comatose sleep. So I get Pat next to me and tell him "I'm gonna go one-two-three with my hand and slam on the brakes. Everyone scream like we're gonna die, and you get pictures of Dave when we do. Tell everyone in the car." So, he passed it around. We got to a side street, Pat turned around with his camera and got ready. One, two, three, BRAKE.

To this day, Pat still has the table he made with four photos laminated into the tabletop - Dave, sleeping peacefully. Dave, same position, eyes wide open in terror. Dave, sitting bolt upright screaming. And Dave, blurry and up close as he fell forward into the camera lens. It's Pat's living room table - his (then-future) wife Amy was sitting next to him in the wagon that night and they both refuse to get rid of it.

 

[wahya]

It was a couple of days before the Fourth of July in the very early 70s. My cousins (2 brothers) had been up in the Carolinas and they had stopped somewhere and loaded up on fireworks. I was following behind them as they drove down a country road in the driver’s El Camino.
My cousin,Dennis, the passenger in the car, decided to light up an m-80 and meant to throw it out the window, I think to maybe have it blow up near my car. The problem was, the windows were all closed and the thing bounced onto the floor. Dennis could do nothing but try and bring his legs up. The m-80 went off and the cab of the car immediately filled with smoke.
We pulled over and Dennis had spots of blood running down both legs (he was in shorts).
My other cousin, the driver, is currently in an institution for his failing brain and I try to call him every couple of days. He has brought up this story several times and we both still get a chuckle from it.

 

[1 Wild R/T]

Told the story before, guess I'll tell it again...Back around 93 I was working on my Challenger convertible... Getting it ready for paint... The hood, fenders, doors & decklid were removed.. The gas tank & trunk floor were removed.... I'd been pulling it in & out of my shop running on race gas in a gallon lacquer thinner can bailing wired to the shock crossmember... No seats, no glass, convertible top is removed.... It's rolling on junk tires & wheels....

So one day after driving 30 miles home from work as I pull into the shop complex I notice there's some pretty good tire marks.. Knowing the only car present that's capable of doing it would be my car I ask questions... But naturally no ones fessing up... Instead telling me it was our buddy Greg in his 6 cylinder Chevy truck... Not buying it but not really too concerned, not like I haven't done the same thing with the car...
Crack a beer & forget about it...

Christmas comes along & my buddy Mike has a gift for me... A framed 8x10 Glossy photo..... It's still sitting on my dresser.. Cracks me up every time I think about it....

So Mike's driving, sitting on a milk crate.... Behind him is my buddy Dean, Passenger front Rhett & behind him is Greg....

 

[kiwigtx]

Told the story before, guess I'll tell it again...Back around 93 I was working on my Challenger convertible... Getting it ready for paint... The hood, fenders, doors & decklid were removed.. The gas tank & trunk floor were removed.... I'd been pulling it in & out of my shop running on race gas in a gallon lacquer thinner can bailing wired to the shock crossmember... No seats, no glass, convertible top is removed.... It's rolling on junk tires & wheels....

So one day after driving 30 miles home from work as I pull into the shop complex I notice there's some pretty good tire marks.. Knowing the only car present that's capable of doing it would be my car I ask questions... But naturally no ones fessing up... Instead telling me it was our buddy Greg in his 6 cylinder Chevy truck... Not buying it but not really too concerned, not like I haven't done the same thing with the car...
Crack a beer & forget about it...

Christmas comes along & my buddy Mike has a gift for me... A framed 8x10 Glossy photo..... It's still sitting on my dresser.. Cracks me up every time I think about it....

So Mike's driving, sitting on a milk crate.... Behind him is my buddy Dean, Passenger front Rhett & behind him is Greg....
View attachment 1688270

...awesome.

 

[Outlaw525]

1977 or 1978- We lived out of town on a two lane country road. We would "road surf" up and down the road. My buddies and I would take turn towing each other behind my Hodaka dirt bike on my sister's bright pink plastic skateboard. (we eventually destroyed the skateboard) The goal was to keep going faster until the guy being toward got scared and let go of the tow rope. Lots of crashes in the ditch and laughing at each other.

We are out road surfing on afternoon after a little weed burning session and my buddy is towing me and looks back with a weird look on his face and starts to speed up. Next thing I know the County Deputy that was friends with my parents pulls up beside me with lights and sirens on. Keep in mind I am still speeding down the road on the skateboard being towed by a dirt bike. We stop and the Deputy chews my butt and tells me to get on the bike with my buddy and get my *** home. He sends us on our way on the county road with no helmets on a bike with no lights. Makes me laugh and smile to think of how different things were then.

And I just recently got another Hodaka!

 

[Basket case]

This car, and the well endowed Blonde that taught me about the back seat...

 

[gtx6970]

Walked into out local Autozone about 2 years ago. Told the kid at the counter I needed a freeze plug in 1.25inch size.

He looked at me and asked Year make and model. With all my might I fought back what I really wanted to say

But felt best to let it go and Gave him the info he requested, 1967 Coronet

He walks back and comes out with a box of exactly what I told him I needed.

Excellent,,,I decided to take 2 of them in case I screwed one up. He looks me in the eye and tells me I have to take the whole box of 25 !!!!!!!!

Excuse me I ask.,,, He says they are priced to sell the entire box . So ask calmly as I could. I ask, what in the hell was I going to do with 25 , when I only needed one.

I walked out and went to Orielly's and told the girl at the counter what I needed. She goes back and comes out with the same exact Dorman box AZ had. Pulls me out 2 and rings it up. no qualms, no worries. In and out in under 5 minutes


I was pissed bigtime that day, but look back and laugh at it today

 

[Basket case]

I was after a hard brake line for my road runner. Took the old one with me for length. It was a Sunday, so I had to go to AutoZone....yeah. kid at the counter insisted the fittings were metric. I explained that Chrysler didn't use metric in 69...ended leaving and going to Advanced.

 

[3sloppydogs]

I worked for the local government, howard county, right out of high school. Said I was going to leave all the time when I was young but never did. I retired from there after 37 years but wished often that I had written down all of the things I saw, heard and witnessed. Also the people. They were from all walks of life,education,backgrounds etc
So for example one day
I pull up on the job site and Willie Lee is just standing there looking at the hand compactor.
What's the matter Willie?
Man( in a long drawn out voice) its my jumping jack
She just won't jump