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U.S. Horses Terrified Obese Americans Will Need Them For Transportation Again

Richard Cranium

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March 18th, 2022
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U.S.—As gas prices skyrocket, many Americans are looking for alternate forms of travel that will save them money. This has many in the equine community fearful of being used as transportation once again by a nation of overweight and obese citizens.

“With gas unaffordable, I know these humans will want to use us again to get around,” neighed Two-Bit, a local Appaloosa from Missouri. “I know my ancestors used to carry them everywhere, but geez—have you seen the size of these people now? These folks today just aren't built the same!”

“We horses know this administration has dealt the American people a bad hoof with their terrible policies, but breaking our backs to lug y'all around is not the answer!" said a local Arabian horse named Omar. "We already have to run around tracks and perform at rodeos for your entertainment, when will enough be enough?!”

Some horse unions have stated they will not carry human riders unless they maintain a body fat percentage of 15% or less. “Try eating some oats or carrots, they are delicious and healthy. Also maybe try getting off of TikTok and go running a bit, is that too much to ask?” said one rep.

Most Americans agreed that these requests were simply too much and petitioned the President to reach out to Saudi Arabia and ask if they would be willing to import camels instead.
 
This would be funny if not for the fact that
methane is a far worse air polluter than
carbon dioxide. 300,000,000 equine exhaust
pipes would produce a lot of air pollution.
 
The left not only want our cars gone,but they want cows and horses gone too! You gonna be walkin RC!
 
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Does that mean camels will be brought into the country to save the "horses"?? After all, too much "horse power" is not compliant with CAFE standards.:rolleyes:
 
Have you priced a horse and feed as of late? I'll pay $5.00+ a gal. Lol.
Wife was spending about $1700 a month boarding her horse, including the farrier, chiropractor (yep) and vet bills. Just to ride twice a week. Saddle was $4500 then all the other tack needed, and we thought cars are expensive!

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Wife was spending about $1700 a month boarding her horse, including the farrier, chiropractor (yep) and vet bills. Just to ride twice a week. Saddle was $4500 then all the other tack needed, and we thought cars are expensive!
Buddy of mine supported his wife horse habit for years.... Hell, he bought a home in the country & built horse barns, stables & a riding arena... Then came the big D.... Her horses had no long term value so that didn't matter.. However his Superbird did have long term value... Which she of course was entitled to 50% of....
 
Now days truth is stranger than fiction.

Possible stable was trying to prevent her getting bucked off and suing for injuries.



 
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