Things you should never do when you're lit

[1STMP]

I'm up at 3:00 a.m. and decided to try and
trim my long ignored fingernails, but am a
couple shots down. Bad move.
I'll start the list of things one should never
attempt while under the influence. I'm not
talking about driving, carrying on an
intelligent conversation, or politics. Just
everyday tasks.
1. Lighting the briquettes
2. Mowing the lawn
3. Cooking ANYTHING
4. Tuning up the 440
5. Telling the wife you'll take care
of that, tomorrow.....
Please feel free to add to the list.
Humor goes a long way here.
"Hold my beer" incidences don't count.

 

[Outlawd]

Stay away from shopping on Ebay while lit or strange packages arrive at your door a week later.

 

[Roger63]

Riding a bicycle, I tried it once and got stuck in between a pole and a building

 

[kiwigtx]

Argue with the inlaws.......especially on Christmas Day.

Been there, done that.....got the evil looks.

 

[Hey-O]

Had a few once and bought a crate engine on line one night. It showed up about a week later, by truck!!

 

[Grabbergreendream]

Years ago, I was half tanked checking out some vids of some pro's running nitro powered RC buggies around and got intrigued. I remember curiously checking some prices on eBay. A week later, I get a Chinese version of a pro-grade model. It was cheep & fun to play with, but yeah, I dont remember clicking any "buy" buttons...

 

[GrabberOrange69]

“Will you marry me?”
Buy or sell stocks
Call anybody on the phone
Vote
Use power tools

 

[WileERobby]

Tell her that you love her, before you know her name.

 

[79300]

Playing pick-up ice hockey. Late night ice time was cheap so I gave it a try after several beers.
Big mistake. A lesson learned 40 years ago.

 

[Ranger16]

Respond to threads on forums.

 

[Roger63]

Water skiing, we used to have contests to see who could chug the most beers while on ski's.

 

[69a100]

Riding a bicycle!

Stay away from shopping on Ebay while lit or strange packages arrive at your door a week later.

Steve Goodman had that problem too, you need to listen to this!!

 

[Fran Blacker]

Working on the brakes on any car! I followed that rule but still had one F-up but no consequences.

 

[#41]

Shave with a chain saw.

 

[Ron H]

This may not qualify; but backing out of a parking spot lit? My boss, co-owner of the machine shop I worked at, and I were at the local gin mill with a few other employees after work. We were playing pool as partners doing pretty good. At the time I was on a league for said gin mill decent player. Had a date that evening with my girl (would be my wife some years later). Well ****, my boss kept handing me beers to stay a little longer. Finally, I was way late and said gotta go! I had a new Challenger, and my boss had his company leased new ride, ’73 Chrysler. Damn I backed out and smacked into his left rear bumper. Nope, should not have gone to my girlfriend’s house as I was obviously tanked. Another story.

Next morning looking at my bumper, had a little vertical kink. When I got to work, I looked at Geno’s car (my boss). ****, I did some damage pushing his quarter panel forward. Damn. He had no idea who hit his car mentioning it that morning. He was one of the best guys I knew, like a 2nd dad. I was sick about it plus the hangover. I finally knew I had to fess up, “Geno, I’m sorry-sorry…I hit your car last night.” Being the guy he was he gave me some teasing **** about it, not mad saying fed ya too many beers I see. I said I’d pay for the damage; but he didn’t make me pay for it. He was a great guy, taught me a lot about machining. Everyone who knew him loved him. Sad day going to his funeral a few decades later.

 

[Under Pressure]

Accepting a Dare from an also lit friend

 

[Nxcoupe]

Trying to carry a conversation with a really hot chick, besides the obvious lack of communication skills and suave manner, I really didn't care where my eyes landed.

 

[Triplegreen500]

Stay away from shopping on Ebay while lit or strange packages arrive at your door a week later.

ANYTHING that requires a password....

More focused from my personal experience (watching, not doing)...don't mix a live concert when you're drunk. What may sound good to you? Doesn't sound good to ANYONE else. I've watched (and stepped in to fix) I don't know HOW many concerts when the FOH engineer (Front Of House) gives himself a good case of beer-ear...

Also, don't paint a room. Or grout tile.

 

[1STMP]

Respond to threads on forums.

At least you didn't mention "starting" threads.

 

[Ron H]

ANYTHING that requires a password....

More focused from my personal experience (watching, not doing)...don't mix a live concert when you're drunk. What may sound good to you? Doesn't sound good to ANYONE else. I've watched (and stepped in to fix) I don't know HOW many concerts when the FOH engineer (Front Of House) gives himself a good case of beer-ear...

Also, don't paint a room. Or grout tile.

Lol, reminds me of a time my dad was painting a car in the garage one night. He always liked his beer and martini’s – garage door open and a respirator for ventilation and some protection. He smoked a lot and glad he didn’t blow the place up. He got up next day having zero recollection of painting the car. How he made it to 94, still sharp as a tack, is a mystery…just glad he had the long ride as a great, ever helpful, dad.