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Never question a drunk: I was shopping at the local supermarket where I selected: A half-gallon of 2% milk A carton of eggs A quart of orange juice A head of lettuce A 2 lb. Can of coffee A 1 lb. Package of bacon As I was unloading my items on the conveyor belt to check out...

A young ventriloquist is touring Sweden and, one night, he's doing a show in a small fishing town. With his dummy on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb blonde jokes. Suddenly, a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting, "I've heard enough of your...

Only the Irish have Jokes Like These: Into a Belfast pub comes Paddy Murphy, looking like he'd just been run over by a train. His arm is in a sling, his nose is broken, his face is cut and bruised and he's walking with a limp. "What happened to you?" asks Sean, the bartender. " Jamie...

I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes (he is 70). We decided to grab a bite at the food court. I noticed he was watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors - green, red, orange, and blue. My dad kept staring...

Here's a new Roadrunner cartoon for all you fans... http://www.wimp.com/looneytoons/