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Vernon works hard at the Phone Company but spends two nights each week bowling, and plays golf every Saturday. His wife thinks he's pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club. The doorman at the club greets them and says, "Hey, Vern! How ya doing?" His...

BROOKLYN TONY strikes again. A teacher decides to let students out early if they can name some quote origins. Teacher: "Who said 'Four Score and Seven Years Ago'?" Before Brooklyn Tony can open his mouth, Susie says, "Abraham Lincoln." "That's right Susie, you can go home." Teacher: "Who said...

The art of conversing with a spouse. With a very seductive voice a wife asked her husband "Have you ever seen twenty dollars all crumpled up?" "No" said her husband. She gave him a sexy little smile, unbuttoned the top three buttons of her blouse and slowly reached down in her cleavage created...

I want to do this to my GF!...for V day

this woman A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. The judge says, "First offender?" She says, "No, first a Gibson, then a Fender!"

A teacher asks the kids in her 3rd grade class: "What do you want to be when you grow up? No one raises their hand BUT Ernie! So "Dirty Ernie says: "I wanna start out as a fighter pilot, then be a billionaire, go to the most expensive clubs, find me the finest whore, give her a Ferrari, a...

what to do with beer bottles........... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NkbZlautuUc

http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=6a8Eimr-fm0 :rolling:

A man wakes up in the hospital bandaged from head to foot. The doctor comes in and says, "Ah, I see you've regained consciousness. Now you probably won't remember, but you were in a huge pile-up on the freeway. You're going to be okay, you'll walk again and...