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Laws Of The Natural Universe

multimopes

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LAWS OF THE NATURAL UNIVERSE

Law of Mechanical Repair:
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.

Law of the Workshop:
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

Law of Probability:
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

Law of the Telephone:
If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.

Law of the Alibi:
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

Variation Law:
If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).

Law of the Bath :
When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

Law of Movies at home:
Same as Law of the Bath .

Law of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

Law of the Result:
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

Law of Biomechanics:
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

Law of the Theatre:
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.

Law of Coffee:
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

Murphy's Law of Lockers:
If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

Law of Location:
No matter where you go, there you are.

Law of Logical Argument:
Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

Brown's Law:
If the shoe fits, it's ugly.

Oliver's Law:
A closed mouth gathers no feet.

Mincey's Law:
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.
 
Murphy's Law of Parking Lots:
If there are only two people leaving in a parking lot, they will have adjacent parking spots and their doors will be facing each other.
 
Murphy's Law of Electricity: If you are carrying or using an extension cord, it will snag on something.
 
Murphy's Law on computers. A computers attention span is as long as it's cord!
 
Murphy’s Law on experimental aircraft: if the wings are going to come off of this thing, it will be when Capt Murphy is flying it!
 
NJ Turnpike's Law of Close Encounters:
Cruising 70mph left lane, some POS tailgating you while left 2 lanes EMPTY, you nail it to get away and you have a close encounter with NJSP, complete with red & blue party lights, NEVER FAILS!!
 
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