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Pete...

MarPar

If it weighs, it pays
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In GTXtacy Illinois
At the end of his sermon the pastor asked if anyone in the congregation wanted to express praise for answered prayers

Suzie Smith stood up and walked to the podium. She said, "I have a praise. Two months ago, my husband, Pete, was in a terrible bicycle accident and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if they could help him.

A muffled gasp arose from the men in the congregation as the thought of the pain poor Pete must have experienced sank in.

"Pete was hurt so badly that he couldn't even hold me or the kids," Suzie continued. "Every movement caused terrible pain. We prayed when his doctors performed the delicate operation required to repair the extensive damage. Luckily they were able to piece the crushed and broken remnants of Pete's scrotum together and wrap it in wire to hold everything in place."

Again, the male half of the congregation squirmed uncomfortably, cringing at the thought of what Pete went through.

"Today," Suzie announced in a quivering voice, "Thanks to the Lord, Pete is out of the hospital. His doctors say that with time, his scrotum should recover completely."

A great sigh of relief arose from the pews. The shaken pastor stood and tentatively asked if anyone else had anything to say.

A man stood up and slowly walked to the podium. He looked around the congregation and said, "I'm Pete." The entire assembly held its collective breath. "I just want to tell my wife that the word is sternum."
 
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