How to tell is someone is a liberal, conservative, or southerner

[CodyS]

How to tell if someone is a Liberal, a Conservative , or a Southerner.

This little test will help you decide:

You’re walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.
Suddenly, a Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges at you…
You are carrying a Kimber 1911 chambered in .45 ACP, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?
******************************
Liberal’s Answer:
Well, that’s not enough information to answer the question! What is a Kimber 1911 and what does .45 ACP mean?
Does the man look poor or oppressed? Is he really a terrorist? Am I guilty of profiling? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation?
Does the pistol have an appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he’d be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
Should I call 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus. This is all so confusing!
******************************
Conservative’s Answer:
BANG!
******************************
Southerner’s Answer:
BANG!
BANG! BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
(Sounds of reloading)
BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG!
Daughter: “Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Speer Gold Dots or Federal Premium hollow points?!”
Son: “Can I shoot the next one?!”
Wife: “You are NOT taking that to a Taxidermist!”

 

[moparedtn]

Guilty as charged - y'all.

 

[Brandy]

Boy howdy!...

 

[PaveFE]

Roll Tide!

 

[gkent]

I think regardless of your political affiliation you're still dead meat simply due to "the 20 foot rule".

 

[Bb70charger500]

20 ft . Rule my ***! He's dead I'm alive he won't argue if he was within 20 ft of me! And no one likes terrorists anyways ,well except obama and his" people!"

 

[gkent]

Talk is cheap !! The 20 ft rule is a proven fact.

 

[Brandy]

it was a joke...get a grip.

 

[5.7 hemi]

I only have 1 eye, so my depth perception is off, and he’s still dead!!

 

[69BBody]

20 foot rule
When a girl looks hot from a distance, but when you see her at 20 feet or less, she turns out to be butt ugly. Usually leads to ackward moment.

 

[Brandy]

ack- ward moment...

 

[CodyS]

I think regardless of your political affiliation you're still dead meat simply due to "the 20 foot rule".

Where in the joke did it say he was within 20 feet or less?

 

[GetX'd]

AT the gun range I belong to (CA) They tell us to make sure and drag him in the house so you don’t get accused to shooting a crook that’s retreating.

 

[68chargerpilot]

They still have gun ranges in Cali?

 

[MarPar]

 

[coloradodave]

They still have gun ranges in Cali?

Yes, a little known fact. There are 4 in my area. Why, we even have some NRA members here! Don't tell anyone, wouldn't want to damage our reputation across the country...

 

[Brandy]

Yes, a little known fact. There are 4 in my area. Why, we even have some NRA members here! Don't tell anyone, wouldn't want to damage our reputation across the country...

You are living a target rich environment.

 

[khryslerkid]

Never heard of a twenty foot rule?

I was on a pistol team for a couple of years, one handed, 25 yards, not 20 feet. After the third week I could keep a one inch group. There's a hundred things you can do wrong when shooting a pistol but with the proper training you can be pretty accurate.

 

[Brandy]

Untrained pistol owners are more of a danger to themselves then the perp. Be lucky if they hit anything vital while pumping adrenalin and shaking. It aint like in the movies...

 

[5.7 hemi]

The hell you say, lol!!!