After Back-To-Back Losses, Chiefs Replace Taylor Swift With Selena Gomez

[Richard Cranium]

Dec 11, 2023







KANSAS CITY, MO — With back-to-back losses following last night's disappointing defeat at the hands of the Buffalo Bills, the Kansas City Chiefs have made a roster move, opting to swap out Taylor Swift for Selena Gomez.

"We just felt it was time to make a change," said Chiefs Head Coach Andy Reid. "We still feel Taylor is a nice girl and she's a strong contributor, and we appreciate everything she's done to help the team, but this league is about results. We think it's time to get someone else in there to see what they can do. We're happy to have Selena."

After taking the league by storm and helping the defending Super Bowl champions get off to a strong start, Taylor Swift had been unable to maintain momentum for the team. "She's been such a huge part of the team this year," said quarterback Patrick Mahomes. "We're all disappointed with the way things have gone lately, but it's still sad to see her go. It's been great to have her on board, but at the same time, this is a business. When the team struggles, someone has to take the blame."

At publishing time, though Swift and her representatives were unavailable for comment, Selena Gomez released a statement addressing the situation. "I'm happy to join the team," Gomez said. "I'm willing to help out in any way I can. I know my role on the team, and I'm ready to achieve big things. I've already made sure TMZ is aware of where I'll be going out with Travis tonight."

 

[Don Frelier]

 

[eldubb440]

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[eldubb440]

maybe "Kadarius" is just too stupid

 

[WileE]

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I would think that Carl got word from higher-ups that he just ruined another storybook ending for the Kansas City Swifties.

 

[eldubb440]

I would think that Carl got word from higher-ups that he just ruined another storybook ending for the Kansas City Swifties.

she does seem to be the kiss of death......... women ruin everything

 

[cosgig]

Selena will make a great teammate for Mahomes wife, who also is under scrutiny for her part in the loss. Seems her big mouth drowned out the hard count, so Toney was unable to draw back his foot the 3’ needed to stay onside! More cuts are coming, it’s time for the hammer to fall!

 

[Davefinan]

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Makes ya wonder if all of that ranting by mahomes wasn’t directed at his team mate…..

 

[eldubb440]

Mahomes got a phantom defensive holding call to end the super bowl last year, screwing everyone out of the last 2 minutes of a great game......he needs to STFU

when defense lines up in the neutral zone, offense gets a "free play" ....... refs never "warn" the defense

 

[Don Frelier]

Makes ya wonder if all of that ranting by mahomes wasn’t directed at his team mate…..

You'd think they would keep an athletic trainer or someone on staff to keep track of his pacifier.

 

[eldubb440]

You'd think they would keep an athletic trainer or someone on staff to keep track of his pacifier.

dude lands in a great spot, with an all time coach, and a loaded roster....... and comes off as a little bitch when the law of averages catches up

 

[33 IMP]

Makes ya wonder if all of that ranting by mahomes wasn’t directed at his team mate…..

Pretty sure a lot of it was. Missed pass interferance call last week, that would have won the game. Loss
This week, STUPID penalty bringing back a game winning pass.
Loss.
But: the guy was likewise offsides FIVE TIMES previously in this game, and he wasn't warned, OR penalized. They wait till ninety seconds left in the game to call a penalty that has only been called on a wide receiver TWICE all year.
Yeah, Mahomes has a right to be pissed at both.
Of course, it IS all her fault, he was looking to see if she was watching, not paying attention to where he was.

 

[YY1]

Neither one of those girls really do anything for me.

Now, Carrie Underwood, I could get behind.

(heh, heh)

 

[WileE]

Neither one of those girls really do anything for me.

As far as Taylor Swift, I've seen better lookin' chicks in a chicken coop.

 

[Scott Engelhardt]

Crybaby should bite his tongue, before the Refs start calling the offensive holding calls that help him escape to getting sacked.

 

[kiwigtx]

With all that padding and taking a rest every 5 seconds, does anyone ever get hurt in those games?

 

[Mackman]

Neither one of those girls really do anything for me.

Now, Carrie Underwood, I could get behind.

(heh, heh)

Those are some thighs!