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After Divorce Settlement, Gisele Expected To Own At Least 3 Times As Many Super Bowl Rings As Aaron Rodgers

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Richard Cranium

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Oct 6, 2022
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TAMPA, FL — After her divorce with Tom Brady becomes finalized, supermodel Gisele Bundchen is expected to own three times as many Super Bowl rings as legendary Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers.

"Gosh, that can't be right," said Ms. Bundchen. "I'm just a model, while he is supposedly one of the best quarterbacks ever. How could I possibly wind up with three times as many rings as Aaron Rodgers?? I'll have to call and ask Aaron again how many rings he has."

Despite only taking three of Mr. Brady's seven Super Bowl rings, Ms. Bundchen discovered from her phone call that she indeed had far surpassed the Green Bay hero. "Yes, Gisele, I really only have one ring. Yes, I know that's very surprising," said Mr. Rodgers grimly. "No, I really don't think I need to count my collection again. Thanks, Gisele."
The sports world has been reeling ever since news broke of Mr. Brady's divorce. "I guess Gisele was just looking for someone better-looking and more successful than Tom," said former teammate Rob Gronkowski. "Man, I just can't wait for Tom to officially be single. Tom is so kind, so generous, and you would not believe how fit he still is. His eyes still sparkle and - wait, what was I talking about?"

At publishing time, reporters spotted Gisele with her new boyfriend Steve, a middle-aged insurance salesman from Indiana.
 
Richard Cranium said:
Oct 6, 2022
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TAMPA, FL — After her divorce with Tom Brady becomes finalized, supermodel Gisele Bundchen is expected to own three times as many Super Bowl rings as legendary Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers.

"Gosh, that can't be right," said Ms. Bundchen. "I'm just a model, while he is supposedly one of the best quarterbacks ever. How could I possibly wind up with three times as many rings as Aaron Rodgers?? I'll have to call and ask Aaron again how many rings he has."

Despite only taking three of Mr. Brady's seven Super Bowl rings, Ms. Bundchen discovered from her phone call that she indeed had far surpassed the Green Bay hero. "Yes, Gisele, I really only have one ring. Yes, I know that's very surprising," said Mr. Rodgers grimly. "No, I really don't think I need to count my collection again. Thanks, Gisele."
The sports world has been reeling ever since news broke of Mr. Brady's divorce. "I guess Gisele was just looking for someone better-looking and more successful than Tom," said former teammate Rob Gronkowski. "Man, I just can't wait for Tom to officially be single. Tom is so kind, so generous, and you would not believe how fit he still is. His eyes still sparkle and - wait, what was I talking about?"

At publishing time, reporters spotted Gisele with her new boyfriend Steve, a middle-aged insurance salesman from Indiana.
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Eli has two of Tommy's rings!
:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:
 
Hmmm...if Aaron gets together with Gisele, on a matrimonial basis, then he would have 4 rings !
 
Are there folks on here that give a rat's *** about this crap????? :D
 
Aaron Rodgers hosted Jeopardy for a few weeks....he did good, but I think he's better known as a footballer.....
 
He did good for 30 minutes today

Contracts

  • 2005: 5-year, $7,700,000 contract
  • 2009: 6-year, $63.52 million contract
  • 2013: 5-year, $110 million contract
  • 2018: 4-year, $134 million contract extension
  • 2022: 3-year, $150.815 million contract extension
 
Skytrooper said:
Hmmm...if Aaron gets together with Gisele, on a matrimonial basis, then he would have 4 rings !
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Frankly if you want my opinion that's the only way that whiney prima-Dona, full of himself QB with a 16 year olds haircut is ever going to get even his second ring. How many years in the league, only one ring and umpteen high stakes failures - but you constantly hear hear analysts like Chris (Aaron can I pls give you a blow job) Collinsworth calling him perhaps the greatest of all time - Huh. There's like a dozen or more QBs, prior and current that I would stack on his high chair above him. And they wouldn't be still hugging their binkys from kindergarten......And I have to add one more thing: Even tho my Vikings have not exactly been kings of the gridiron for some years - The NFC Central has also been one of the weakest divisions for his whole career. Far from the bad assed days of the "Black & Blue division of old and had always been known. Can you tell I'm not a big AR fan....? $50m a year - C'mon man.....

Sorry to all Packer fans, nothing personal but I call em like I see em.
 
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In all fairness... even thought my Giants beat him both times in the super bowl, Tom Brady is the best QB of all time.
 
I have been done with Football since the Kneeling began !
 
Don't know anything about it, but, in my opinion, he should be fired for having bad taste. She does nothing for me!!
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Now, that's better!!
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GetX'd said:
Frankly if you want my opinion that's the only way that whiney prima-Dona, full of himself QB with a 16 year olds haircut is ever going to get even his second ring. How many years in the league, only one ring and umpteen high stakes failures - but you constantly hear hear analysts like Chris (Aaron can I pls give you a blow job) Collinsworth calling him perhaps the greatest of all time - Huh. There's like a dozen or more QBs, prior and current that I would stack on his high chair above him. And they wouldn't be still hugging their binkys from kindergarten......And I have to add one more thing: Even tho my Vikings have not exactly been kings of the gridiron for some years - The NFC Central has also been one of the weakest divisions for his whole career. Far from the bad assed days of the "Black & Blue division of old and had always been known. Can you tell I'm not a big AR fan....? $50m a year - C'mon man.....

Sorry to all Packer fans, nothing personal but I call em like I see em.
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Sorry - I'm not sure I'm getting what you think of Rodgers; could you be more specific?
 
WileERobby said:
In all fairness... even thought my Giants beat him both times in the super bowl, Tom Brady is the best QB of all time.
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No quarterback likes being hit and Giants did that both times. If Wes Welker turned the other way on a pass he might had another ring if if if.....
Giants beat the Pack blocked AR pass. Giant defense a work in progress. Offense QB has too run to much, not a winning formula overall.
 
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gary h said:
I have been done with Football since the Kneeling began !
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I quit paying attention to football when Bum Phillips got fired and the Oilers moved to TN and became the Traitors.....
 
NFL To Provide All Refs Seeing-Eye Dogs



Oct 9, 2022
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ATLANTA, GA — To help improve the accuracy of calls on the field, the National Football League will now provide each referee with a seeing-eye dog.
"What'd you see, Fido? Bark twice if there was holding!" yelled Shawn Hochuli at his new service dog. "Good boy. Does the red team still have the ball? Oh crap, I forgot you're colorblind, Fido!"

The NFL made the move to provide service dogs as part of a concerted effort to raise the level of officiating. "We are really hoping to reach a point where at least occasionally, a call makes sense," said commissioner Roger Goodell. "It's a big ask of these canines to comprehend the intricacies of what's a 'rub route' and what's 'pass interference', but we feel confident they will be more accurate than our current system of a blind man taking a wild guess. Or, excuse me, a blind woman taking a wild guess."

Thus far, the seeing-eye dogs have been welcomed heartily by officials and players alike. "It's a massive improvement already," said Philadelphia quarterback Jalen Hurts. "The dogs at least guide the refs out of the way when play starts - and a couple of the smarter pups have already caught on to 'offsides', and other simple penalties. They've also eliminated those embarrassing moments when the poor referee does the whole penalty announcement facing the wrong direction. Visual impairment is tough, man."

At publishing time, Atlanta fans across the nation were reportedly screaming about how Fido is so unbelievably biased against the Falcons.
 
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