Back in my time between Wives, I was on a few dating sites. I corresponded with a decent amount of prospective Mrs Kern Dogs.
It was always annoying when I would peck out a long, detailed and (In my opinion) funny/witty message only to see it disappear at some point. Back then I was just starting to use the internet and computers. I'm no expert now but back then, I'd make a mistake and have NO clue what went wrong or how to correct it.
It sucks but in my case, it was always my fault.
That was actually God telling you to stay off those awful sites....
"I like long walks on deserted beaches...and sunsets!"
Some of what the OP is talking about boils down to the "architecture" of the website itself and how it functions,
methinks.
I used to do a lot of freelance website creation many, many moons ago (taught myself html) and I stopped doing
so with the advent of what was called "php" or "php-nuke" language.
It was revolutionary in comparison to tired old html, sure, but with it came all manner of restrictions in the way
you could lay out sites and on how they had to function, something I had been used to controlling myself.
I liked simple - but todays' sites are light years more complicated than anything I played with and I wasn't
that damn interested in things to keep up, since it was something I just played with for fun.
It's their toy - you just have to learn how to play with it.
Hey...how'd THAT get there?