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Friends that you had to let go.

Many times things change in your life and many of your old friends feel your common goals and interests don't line up anymore. You have more or they have more. I have friends, but close friends of like lifestyles have been thinning out as we get older.
 
I've had "friends" who really only turned out to be users. Can you get me a deal? Can I get it for free? I slowly rid myself of them. Another pair of "friends" let their degree's get to their heads and their acquired social status. One of them could't let his new homies know what kind of people he used to associate with because of his position/status. Another finally got work at a university as a T/A using his chemistry degree. Before that we conversed on a regular basis. After, couldn't be bothered to return a call hardly. I would try to touch bases with him once a month since there was a 300 mile distance between us. After numerous attempts I finally got him on the phone one evening. He told me he was busy, I was interrupting him and to not call again. I don't have a degree in higher education but even someone like me with a low IQ can figure the meaning there. Almost 20 years later, have not gotten an apology. I guess when you are at that social status level you can't admit you ffd up. Another "friend" has given us the talk to the hand 4 times for reasons we didn't cause. One was from my older brother blowing in his ear talking smack about my honey and I. He finally figured that out and apologized. Next two were do to the psycho he married causing problems causing him to give us the happy finger. Got something of an apology there. He did it again after hooking up with some gal after we moved up here. After 4 times of talk to the hand, we are done.
 
I've had a lot of friends over the years. The funny thing about the meme posted earlier is that my situation is the total opposite. Most of my childhood friends are now null and void. I saw how most of them were. Snobby or couldn't care less later in life. The close friends that I have now are from my late teenage years and up. Some are bikers and have been drug dealers another one is a Nazi punk, metal heads and even a probation officer. Because of our history, they have become some of my closest friends. Bikers live by the brotherhood code. I'm thankful that they see me like that. We can get together and have fun and it's not all ME ME ME. There are a couple that do like to talk about themselves sometimes but they also listen to me. I give them an ear if they need to vent. Sometimes it's just a call on a nice sunny afternoon to go get lunch. I do feel that I am blessed with friendship.
 
Many times things change in your life and many of your old friends feel your common goals and interests don't line up anymore. You have more or they have more. I have friends, but close friends of like lifestyles have been thinning out as we get older.
I know another guy that I used to hang out with a lot. He was actually my manager at a Burger King when I was in High School.
We used to have Mopars in common. He wrenched on them with the same passion as I, but a series of bad decisions he has made over the past 10 years has left him with no car and seemingly very little interest in them again. He got into drinking and chasing women at a late age....early 60s.
I don't really care to hear a guy talk about some music festival he attended, how drunk he was or some skank he tried to bang. I'm not 25 anymore. He is in a stage of regressive development, doing things he missed out on as a young man and I just don't care to hear it every time he calls.
 
I have very few old friends left that I hang out with, still have a handful of true friends but at this stage in our lives we usually only see each other when one of us needs a hand.. family life. I parted ways with many in the past that took on the party life, some became lazy, others annoying to be around but for the most part it's likely that I'm just not much fun. I don't know why but I tend to think along the logic that a day without accomplishment is a day wasted and as a result spend much of my time working towards a goal (boring to most). It's fine by me, since getting married I really don't need anyone outside of my family anyways and still occasionally get to spend some quality riding time with my closest friend, 35ish year friendship.

I guess you could say I enjoy much in life but little of it requires anyone outside of my wife and kids, not something I decided but that's just the way it's become.
 
We've parted ways with a bunch of people, some relatives, some very devout Mopar enthusiasts. The main reason has been the Political Divide. No matter how much you lay out the facts, they'll have none of it. We don't miss any of them...
 
The only friendship that really hurt to let go was a childhood friend and the best man at my wedding. While his wife was sitting home with their kid, he was chasing bar skanks. I wasn’t willing to lie to provide an alibi for his abhorrent behavior. There’s a lot more to the story, but I resented being put in that position. Nope, not going to do it…
 
I know another guy that I used to hang out with a lot. He was actually my manager at a Burger King when I was in High School.
We used to have Mopars in common. He wrenched on them with the same passion as I, but a series of bad decisions he has made over the past 10 years has left him with no car and seemingly very little interest in them again. He got into drinking and chasing women at a late age....early 60s.
I don't really care to hear a guy talk about some music festival he attended, how drunk he was or some skank he tried to bang. I'm not 25 anymore. He is in a stage of regressive development, doing things he missed out on as a young man and I just don't care to hear it every time he calls.
I had friends that got divorced and wanted me run with them once in awhile. That doesn't work!! When you find one, bring her by, if she's not some barfly.
 
Glad I'm not the only one that suffers this crap from 'friends' ........
 
Some of these people seem to be both attention hogs and oblivious to their own faults.
 
The 3 amigos I mention above are one of the main reasons I don't have a Thyroid anymore. Spent way too much time wondering what I did to the freindship to cause the divide, way too many hours beating myself up. Thyroid issues come from either stress or heredity. Family has no heredity issues but there was stress caused there too. Now I let it roll off as much as possible. One of the many nice things about The Big Guy Above.
 
I haven't commented on this thread because it would be a freakin book!!!!
 
We have friends that were on they exact opposite spectrum regarding politics. Didn’t discuss it and we got along extremely well. Unfortunately he passed away in 2014, but still see her yearly.
 
When you move 120-200 miles away (or more, farther)
from where your perceived friends were/are...
You really learn which are 'real friends'
& which are merely acquaintances...
Those that hung out, drank your beer, leaners, BS-ers
that needed help on their stuff & rarely came over
to actually help on yours...
But you always helped them with projects...
House, cars, yards or otherwise...

I have them from Rancho Murieta & Concord...

A bunch were lost in divorces, they literally disappeared
or became recluses...
Or new couples, the lady or guy depending on the situation
I had quite a few women friends too, meet a *new partner...
*Usually the person doesn't fit in the group well...

I used to have "Monday Night Football/or summertime Pool Parties" all year round
Whether it was football season or not, we had a Monday night party
It was always at my place too, never anywhere else,
most their wives/husbands would never allow it...
But their wives would come & help dirty trash my place
& mine was nicer than most...

We had a collection going at all the dealerships of recycled stuff
take off aluminum car parts that were junk 'warranty stuff', then cans & bottles etc.
To buy Pizzas or KFC or Taco Bell, mostly for snacks, before the main meals...

We had like 9 regulars that'd chosen a week to cook their specialty
Beef Wellington, Full blown Turkey diner & Fixxing, Chile', Lazognia, Spaghetti & Meatballs :blah:
regular traditional BBQ stuff, Steaks, Ribs, Chicken, Hamburgers, or Sausages
mostly in warmer weather periods...
We'd rotate who cooked every week, someone would come up with something,
commit to it, then go out & buy it, it all worked out pretty well...

One of my good friends Mike D. was a Liquire distributor,
for Southern Wine & Spirits...
They'd do offsite displays, promotions for specific booze/s drinks mixers etc.,
We'd base the party theme 'sometimes' around what Mike brought...
'Mike' would save whatever, shot glasses, napkins, boozes,
sunglasses & posters, all kinds of trinkets like watches & lighters etc.
Party favors type stuff& bring the stuff to our parties...

A bunch of people from 4 main Concord Dealerships,
many were parts or service people, a few salespeople, more blue-collar crowd...
A few times the owners would show up too...
It was pretty lively...
Everyone (to an extent) was welcome...
I always put the word out at the dealership...
Many were afraid to attend, I don't know why... :poke:
Anyway;
I had a smoking lounge, recliners & carpet, a sectional couch & a big screen TV
all set up in the garage, 1 stall of 5, for people that smoked (you name it)
I didn't allow smoking in my place...
People were always encouraged to bring a plus 1, we had lots of food & drinks...

Those 9 regulars are still good friends, the rest 10 or so at most...
I rarely see or even hear from now, especailly since I moved ebven further east
into the Sierras, almost nobody come up here...

The bunch of US (the 9) all went to Hawaii for 13-ish years straight, of 15 total
to see the Pro-Bowl...
We'd all vacation together for a week, sometimes 2
Before NFL screwed that up too...
Some would bring wives, some would go stag...
We did that from like late 80s into the mid 90's up to like 1997...

(Same crew of 9 give or take a couple, would go to Incline Village Northshore Tahoe
sort of semi-annually, 7 of 10 or so years total, usually right around Hot August Night,
the week before or after...
We'd stay in company condos from the dealership group I worked with
it was a nice lil' perk they afforded me...
We'd go water skiing Mike had a great boat 26' Danzi IO 351Cleveland,
I had a skiboat I got in trade for work, Ski Nitique v-drive, 350 GM,
we'd go skiing or tuben' & pull my surfboards, what a blast...
Then maybe go to the Incline Village Celebrity Golf tourney,
hob nob with celebrities, it was before they all became big douches, like now...
It's a big deal now it was small potatoes then...
Then out on the town or casino etc., go to Reno to cruise etc.
)

When I moved to Rancho Murieta in 1997, all of that stuff died off...

I miss them days, what a blast...

Most my racing buddies, I never hear from much anymore...
Most are divorced now too, sold all their stuff
moved on to another woman, many of them (their new person) didn't like our crowd...
 
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I haven't commented on this thread because it would be a freakin book!!!!
like mine

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i sure have been there , got a handful of family close friends and a lot of acquaintances the i had to let go . just got wierd or so annoying that i can’t tolerate there company. granted i’m no peach but my closest friends overlook my shortcomings i there’s . it just them other guys who break the rules , can’t tolerate any more ….
 
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