The last time I ever saw my Dad - and why it guides me to this day

[BB BELLA]

last time i saw my dad,a friday night aug. 1980! I was going out of town for the weekend to visit his sister, he was working afternoon shift and called me at home to bring him 6 pack to work to share with buds at lunchtime! I met him at back of the plant and threw six pack over the fence to him and told him see him sunday night when I got back! got a call sunday morning at his sisters place requesting I come back to toronto immediately and go to our local police station! when I got there they told me he had been murdered at home in a robbery with 3 others!
his advice to me in life was "if your not the best man on the job when you start,be damn sure you are when you leave"

 

[moparedtn]

Thanks, Ed. Sometimes it helps to talk about it. For me, it's writing.

My Dad died the day before Valentine's Day 2012 of a combination of diabetes and prostate cancer, at home, in his bed. When I took him home from the VA hospital in Reno, he told me "make sure I don't go back there again"; not because of the quality of care (it was pretty good for a government facility), it's just he wanted to pass at home. We took the "long way home" (think Supertramp) and just talked. And had moments of silence. Then more talk. I had to fly back to OK a couple of days later, and Dad was in good spirits, considering.

The last night I was there, I rubbed his feet. My grandma taught us all the value of foot health, and she taught all of us kids how to properly massage feet, whether it be our own or someone else. The therapeutic value of a good foot rub can never be overstated. As I rubbed his feet, I could tell he hadn't had his done in a while. The snap, crackle and pop - his feet sounded like a bowl of Rice Krispies! I hadn't seen Dad that relaxed in quite some time. The stress of his hospital stay was really taking its toll.

My little brother and my sister's oldest son were with him when he passed. He was talking to his parents briefly. Then he passed quietly, with that last exhale signaling the End. He was comfortable. Peaceful. In the hands of an all-loving God. Mom would follow on Christmas Eve 2012. They had never spent a Christmas apart since 1955. Mom made sure that their being together for Christmas was going to happen.

Beautifully written! Would that we all should be able to go in such a manner when it's our own time....
Thank you for sharing that - and you should consider writing in this format more often. You're quite good at it.

 

[moparedtn]

last time i saw my dad,a friday night aug. 1980! I was going out of town for the weekend to visit his sister, he was working afternoon shift and called me at home to bring him 6 pack to work to share with buds at lunchtime! I met him at back of the plant and threw six pack over the fence to him and told him see him sunday night when I got back! got a call sunday morning at his sisters place requesting I come back to toronto immediately and go to our local police station! when I got there they told me he had been murdered at home in a robbery with 3 others!
his advice to me in life was "if your not the best man on the job when you start,be damn sure you are when you leave"

Sage advice to be sure - in more than the skills department, too. Thanks!

 

[peabodyracin]

That’s one of the most moving stories I’ve read in a long time, Ed. Thanks for posting.

 

[moparedtn]

That’s one of the most moving stories I’ve read in a long time, Ed. Thanks for posting.

You're very kind, thank you.