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we are doomed

george68hemirr

Well-Known Member
Local time
1:58 PM
Joined
Jan 14, 2009
Messages
470
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299
Location
hudson valley ny
Our society is doomed..............

IDIOT SIGHTING
I handed the teller @ my bank a withdrawal slip for $400.00
I said, "May I have large bills, please?"

She looked at me and said, "I'm sorry sir, all the bills are the same size."
When I got up off the floor I explained it to her....

IDIOT SIGHTING
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'it's open!' His reply: 'I know. I already got that side.'

This was at the Ford dealership in Canton, MS

IDIOT SIGHTING
We had to have the garage door repaired.
The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.
I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.
He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4.
He said, 'NO, it's not..' Four is larger than two.'
We haven't used Sears repair since.

IDIOT SIGHTING
My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill.
Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter.
She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back.
She sighed and went to get the manager, who asked me to repeat my request.
I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said 'We're sorry but we could not do that kind of thing.'
The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change.

Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.


IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco.
She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'
He said he was sorry, but they only had iceburg lettuce.
-- From Kansas City


IDIOT SIGHTING
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked,
'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'
To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'
He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'
Happened in Birmingham , Ala.


IDIOT SIGHTING
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street.
I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.
I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'

She was a probation officer in Wichita, KS


IDIOT SIGHTING
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker who was leaving the company due to 'downsizing,'
Our manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. We should do this more often.'
Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.
This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.

IDIOT SIGHTING
I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself
And for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.
A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriff’s office, no less.


IDIOT SIGHTING
How would you pronounce this child's name?
"Le-a"
Leah?? NO
Lee - A?? NOPE
Lay - a?? NO
Lei?? Guess Again.
This child attends a school in Kansas City, Mo.
Her mother is irate because everyone is getting her name wrong.
It's pronounced "Ledasha".
When the Mother was asked about the pronunciation of the name, she said, "the dash don't be silent."
SO, if you see something come across your desk like this please remember to pronounce the dash.
If dey axe you why, tell dem de dash don't be silent.

STAY ALERT!

They walk among us......and they VOTE.
 
"WE" as a collective, not as an individual .....
 
Oh I just gotta tell you a TRUE story here.. A friend of mine is the director of a medical billing office. They had to contact a person due to an overdue account. The only diff is the spelling..

La-a

She told me the story I though RUFKM???? Nope...................
 
Back in the days before windows, we received a work order from a user that we had "given her the wrong computer".

When our tech arrived, the user said "every time I turn it on, it says 'starting MS DOS'".

"My name is Ms Jackson".
 
"WE" as a collective, not as an individual .....

:iamwithstupid: I know for sure, I didn't vote for any of that, Hope & Change BS, they were pushing the last 2 elections anyway...
 
Yes we as a collective voted him in if we as a collective did not vote him out. If you voted for someone other than the primary challenger or didn't vote at all based on some principle you voted him in.
 
Ah, choosing the lesser evil...
 
That idiot list is gold :) Love it.
 
I hope that you just have a real good imagination & made these up your self. But probably not.
 
In the last Presidential election, I left it blank. For in good conscience, I could not bring myself to vote for either. A sad commentary on the choices we had. Back around 2000, "South Park" had an episode where PETA said they couldn't be called the "Cows" anymore. So they asked for new names for the schools team. Cartman said "Giant Douches", and Stan said "Turd Sandwiches". In the end, Kyle summed it up best by saying "If your only choice is beween a Giant Douche, and a Turd Sandwich, is there really a choice?" Kinda summed up my options for the last few elections.
 
Went to rent a car and asked if there were any domestic cars available. Clerk asked "what is a domestic car?
 
:Groaner:i gave the cashier a Kennedy half dollar, she said what's this. i said a half dollar. she said i know that, but there is no slot in the register for it. i said put in with the dimes and you cant mix it up TRUE STORY! :soapbox: BUY THE WAY not voting is a vote for the wrong guy. i would for Clinton or Hitler or Satan anyone would have been a better choice.
 
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