Now that you guys have settled down and finished the turkey, I thought I'd share this one....
This guy had a real problem farting. Every morning he would wake up and play trouser trumpets for ages. His wife was disgusted, and every morning she would tell him "One day you'll fart so hard, that you'll blow your guts out."
This went on for years, and so one day ...just happened to be Thanksgiving morning, the wife decided on her revenge. She carefully removed all the giblets and gooey stuff from inside the turkey that was being prepped to cook. Quietly she snuck up the stairs, and while her husband was still snoring loudly, she carefully placed all the turkey giblets and muck inside his underwear. It was nearly an hour before she heard a blood-curdling scream coming from upstairs....then silence for what seemed like another half hour.
Husband walks downstairs looking a bit confused and upset. She says to him "What's up dear?"
He replies "You remember how you always tell me that if I keep farting really hard, one day my guts will all fall out."
Wife says "Yeah.....and..."
Husband says "Well, today my guts did fall out. But don't worry, I managed to stuff it all back in again."

Happy Thanksgiving to all.
This guy had a real problem farting. Every morning he would wake up and play trouser trumpets for ages. His wife was disgusted, and every morning she would tell him "One day you'll fart so hard, that you'll blow your guts out."
This went on for years, and so one day ...just happened to be Thanksgiving morning, the wife decided on her revenge. She carefully removed all the giblets and gooey stuff from inside the turkey that was being prepped to cook. Quietly she snuck up the stairs, and while her husband was still snoring loudly, she carefully placed all the turkey giblets and muck inside his underwear. It was nearly an hour before she heard a blood-curdling scream coming from upstairs....then silence for what seemed like another half hour.
Husband walks downstairs looking a bit confused and upset. She says to him "What's up dear?"
He replies "You remember how you always tell me that if I keep farting really hard, one day my guts will all fall out."
Wife says "Yeah.....and..."
Husband says "Well, today my guts did fall out. But don't worry, I managed to stuff it all back in again."
Happy Thanksgiving to all.
