Caregiver

[steve from staten island]

Any caregivers here, elderly parents, spouse?
I mean actual caregivers that is.
Dealing with social services, getting outside help, medicare, power of attorney, that sought of thing.

 

[Budnicks]

yep

 

[kiwigtx]

ummm....should I move this to the Political Forum now to save time later....

 

[64SF]

For the past 5 years me, my wife and sister in law for my 94 year old father....he passed two weeks ago ...peacefully in his sleep exactly where he wanted to...in his home of 50 plus years.

 

[steve from staten island]

View attachment 815451

ummm....should I move this to the Political Forum now to save time later....

No, dont know why anyone would turn it political but then again....
My thoughts are when an how some finally convinced the elders whom they cared for when it was time to get outside help.
Also financial issues, like bill paying and the such.
Im handling a problem right now for mom in law and her real estate taxes. I was complaining about the city when I discovered it wasn't the cities fault. Mom made a mistake on a form and lost her senior discount, its a lot of money for somebody living on a small pension and SS.

 

[coronet68mx]

View attachment 815451

ummm....should I move this to the Political Forum now to save time later....

I don't want to mark the dreadful red x to you Roger, but I agree with Steve, why is it that most guys here consider that because he have a different point of view , everything he wrote here must be turned into a political issue, Steve is a great guy, one of the guys here I truly want to meet some day.
He cares so much for others, not only his own family, and for that, he deserve respect, at least my respect and my friendship, looks like every tread he post someone has to start a war against him, it's not fair, is a good question for a tread and let's keep it that way please.

 

[steve from staten island]

For the past 5 years me, my wife and sister in law for my 94 year old father....he passed two weeks ago ...peacefully in his sleep exactly where he wanted to...in his home of 50 plus years.

Sorry for your loss but knowing your dad passed that way should bring you some comfort.
Unfortunately it doesn't always go that way and since my moms two daughters can't do as much as they would like to, its fallen on me, not that I mind or cant handle it.
My biggest fear is she falls and im as gently as I can trying to introduce the idea of a woman to come in a few hours a day to help

 

[steve from staten island]

I don't want to mark the dreadful red x to you Roger, but I agree with Steve, why is it that most guys here consider that because he have a different point of view , everything he wrote here must be turned into a political issue, Steve is a great guy, one of the guys here I truly want to meet some day.
He cares so much for others, not only his own family, and for that, he deserve respect, at least my respect and my friendship, looks like every tread he post someone has to start a war against him, it's not fair, is a good question for a tread and let's keep it that way please.

Leon dont waste your time trying to explain. I know you mean well and have the best of intentions

 

[coronet68mx]

But...

 

[moparnation74]

But...

....................

 

[coronet68mx]

 

[Lefty71]

Actually did that for a good long while. The most trying thing I'll ever deal with I suppose. I like to think of myself as "over the hump" at this point, solely because I've learned to ride the wave after this many years. Any advice you think I (or we) can give, you just have to ask.

Good luck, and chin up.

 

[kiwigtx]

But...

It was meant in fun Leon.

 

[Hey-O]

Actually did that for a good long while. The most trying thing I'll ever deal with I suppose. I like to think of myself as "over the hump" at this point, solely because I've learned to ride the wave after this many years. Any advice you think I (or we) can give, you just have to ask.

Good luck, and chin up.

X2

 

[hanks73340]

Sorry for your loss but knowing your dad passed that way should bring you some comfort.
Unfortunately it doesn't always go that way and since my moms two daughters can't do as much as they would like to, its fallen on me, not that I mind or cant handle it.
My biggest fear is she falls and im as gently as I can trying to introduce the idea of a woman to come in a few hours a day to help

Your a good man 'Charlie Brown' as the old saying goes. Went thru the same stuff with my mother-in law. It wasn't easy but I don't regret it since she was a wonderful lady and alot of fun even until the very end. My hat's off to you sir...

 

[64SF]

Sorry for your loss but knowing your dad passed that way should bring you some comfort.
Unfortunately it doesn't always go that way and since my moms two daughters can't do as much as they would like to, its fallen on me, not that I mind or cant handle it.
My biggest fear is she falls and im as gently as I can trying to introduce the idea of a woman to come in a few hours a day to help

Thank you....a couple of things that really helped us a lot, Best Buy sells small monitoring cameras (D-link)that can be accessed with your phone. More than once they saved the day by letting us see any problems he encounted.

Also, there is a small "alert" device sold by stores like Walmart. GreatCall is the mfg and provides an inexpensive emergency response center. You press the small button, it contacts GreatCall....the device/operator can speak to the person in need, call 911 if necessary and then will call those listed on the profile page. The device was less than $30.00 and the call center was about 30.00 a month. More than once he used the device....it well worth the money.

As far as the other matters, Power of Attorney, designated health care surrogate forms, living will, do not resuscitate instructions (if wanted) I would advise everyone to take a look at what works best for your situation.

Here in our area Hospice also provides a service similar to Home Heath Care. You may want to contact them to see if she would be eligible. They bill Medicare.

 

[Slap Stick]

BTDT. Ask questions!

 

[super-bee_ski]

Any caregivers here, elderly parents, spouse?
I mean actual caregivers that is.
Dealing with social services, getting outside help, medicare, power of attorney, that sought of thing.

I did it....
Moved my ailing Mom to CA January 2010 and she made it an extra 8 years, lived in one of our 3 rentals right next door. She passed at the age of 90, Dec 17 2017.
Due to a broken ankle, Hospital essentially killed her.
Steve From Staten Island: it was difficult, but I did it. To this day I miss her, and furthermore I think I could have done more. But, She would never have made it in her RI home alone. It was a true challenge, I received no "State off CA" support for monies as a Care Giver...CA has too much Red Tape.
Last year, August 17-22 I flew to RI, all her Cousins and my family came to the ceremony, I spread her ashes...everyone said I did a "Good Job"
Yeah, I call "BS" on Joan Lunden's "A place for Mom", Ha Ha...rat infested nursing homes, neglected Elderly and all those places see is a Paycheck/Bank Account.
I would do it again, AND, I was still working F-22 Flight Test and the Air Force Flight Test Center, Edwards CA.
And yes, I was the actual Caregiver, My wife made every meal, Mom was Type II Diabetic, I checked her blood 2X daily, 0545Hrs and 1630 Hrs along with providing her insulin shots. Drove her to all Med appointments, she was legally Blind in one eye, Macular Degeneration and bad eyesight in the other.
I'll pat myself on the back and say: "My wife and I did good"
Heck, one weekend, HEMI-ITIS and his wonderful wife came to Pomona, NHRA drags, I had to leave early to get home to my Mom.
Yup, do a good Job SFSI....do it.

 

[super-bee_ski]

yep

Yup, I have PM with Budnicks on this matter...he does it....

 

[Budnicks]

Yup, I have PM with Budnicks on this matter...he does it....

going on 12 years now...