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There's a responsibilty issue with the 34 y.o. Can he be responsible with your car? Do it once and you'll be asked again. He needs your car to go somewhere else.
The larger issue is that he needs to get a job and pay for his own stuff just like many of us have. I told his mother let me deal with him and he will either be working and paying his way or out on his ***. I was going to give him a month to get a job or he's gotta go. My budget does not include a grown *** man. Hes the only person that I can think of that is jobless and gained weight.
What does meathead stepson do for transportation when he is not going to weddings?
He got himself into this pedestrian situation, I would not help him by giving him another car.
He is apparently babied by his mother, which is not helping anybody.
It just sucks that they are guilt mongering you. It is not your fault or problem.
Not trying to sound nasty here, but wife is not being very reasonable and isn't doing her 34 yr old son any favors. It seems mom is enabling her 34 yr old son. As others pointed out here, that "kid" has very little sense of responsibility! Is he an alcoholic like bio dad? And wife/mom is angry with you? She may want to direct that toward her son. He sorely needs consequences. Blow off paying insurance? Then ya can't drive the car.
Pretty simple.