Having Kids: Pros and Cons

[SteveSS]

When I got married my ex pretty much had a schedule, including when and how many kids to have. We have two. The boy is 30 the girl is 32, no grandkids. I'm glad she did because I might not have ever got around to it. It's the absolute BEST thing I have ever done in my life. The whole baby thing wasn't as great as it is for women but from about 2 years on they are great! If they asked me to I would sell all my cars tomorrow and give them the money if they needed it. I would sell my house and go live in an RV if it was needed. I would lay down my life for them. None of this is hyperbole I promise I would do it!

If there is such a thing as a meaning to life, this is it.

 

[chtampa]

If you get caught, the parents want them back, you go to prison, get beat up and have to register whenever you move.

 

[Budnicks]

Kids, the good ones anyway
someone to change/empty the catheter bag or diapers
when you're old & decrepit

ask me how I know (?)
that's rhetorical
I'm very near that point now with my father
who lives with me since like 2005, every new year is another hurdel
he really should have taken better care of himself

I made him/my dad a promise
"I won't put him in a senior home"
I tend to think it's going well 'so far'
It is extremely hard at times too
but it's something we should do too

many kids wouldn't/won't even do it
I know 2 of my bros & sisters wouldn't/won't
too selfish, too into themselves & a fake life filled with trinkets/possessions
they'd put him in a senior home & then probably ignore him too
it'd probably just suck up all his savings & Inheritance

I would like to think 1 or all of my kids will do well too

 

[F4R/T]

I love mine, I managed to keep my toys but the work came to a stall for many years.. Let me tell you they are more expensive then any car you can dream of.. No regrets ... Glad I had them young.

 

[SteveSS]

My mom is 92 but she gets around pretty well. I take her grocery shopping, shovel her driveway, take her to her doctor's appointments, and things like that. She calls me almost every day but that's okay. The weird thing is at 66, my age. I can't play the old card since she is so much older than me.

 

[chargervert]

My mom is 92 but she gets around pretty well. I take her grocery shopping, shovel her driveway, take her to her doctor's appointments, and things like that. She calls me almost every day but that's okay. The weird thing is at 66, my age. I can't play the old card since she is so much older than me.

Enjoy every day you spend with her,because one day they are gone! RIP Mom!

 

[hemi*guy]

Couldn’t imagine life without my kids and my grandkids. I am blessed!

 

[Mopar Hunter]

I don’t have kids, but I sure like practicing to have them.

 

[GetX'd]

Kids, the good ones anyway
someone to change/empty the catheter bag or diapers
when you're old & decrepit

ask me how I know (?)
that's rhetorical
I'm very near that point now with my father
who lives with me since like 2005, every new year is another hurdel
he really should have taken better care of himself

I made him/my dad a promise
"I won't put him in a senior home"
I tend to think it's going well 'so far'
It is extremely hard at times too
but it's something we should do too

many kids wouldn't/won't even do it
I know 2 of my bros & sisters wouldn't/won't
too selfish, too into themselves & a fake life filled with trinkets/possessions
they'd put him in a senior home & then probably ignore him too
it'd probably just suck up all his savings & Inheritance

I would like to think 1 or all of my kids will do well too

I agree with you Bud. You’re a good man for doing what you’re doing with your Pops. Far to many wouldn’t/won’t do what you’re doing. I’ve seen it - not in my family but had a cousin that put his mom (my aunt) in a home and just flat left her there. Never visited didn’t seem to care. I recall visiting her one day (Like most of the family they live in MN) and that poor thing was curled up in a fetal position and just layed there for years by herself. My mother would visit her when she was alive but after mom passed no one else ever went there. She lived into her 90’s and her POS son (only child) just left her there alone for many years. He, himself passed a year or two ago in his 70’s. I never thought much of him when I found out about my aunt and how he treated her- and he did the same with his father after a stroke. I went to visit my uncle when in town - but I just wasn’t around much having left Mpls 40 years ago. Your reward will be in Heaven Bud.
And your pops will be there refreshed and with you.
Good man!

 

[Cojohnso1]

Some is. "Do you like kids?" If no? Maybe parenthood is not for you.

Personally I like kids. If they found a big enough puddle to sit in? So would I. I raised 4 kids. And even as I'm approaching retirement years ahead? I would not be devastated if some unexpected company was to enter.

I can say, yes. You can have a perfectly happy life without. But don't exclude because of fear. Because? They fear not. (Except for monsters under the bed. You may need to check now and then.)

 

[Hey-O]

I know people that didn't want kids and then there are those that couldn't. I have no regrets, yes I lost my son, the day my real life ended. I know that even with the hurt of losing him, I'd do it again just to hear his voice one more time. No one said life was going to be fair and many times l've asked why me, then I ask, why not me, because I would never wish it on someone else. I sometimes think I took it for the team, pretty stupid thinking for someone that knows it doesn't work that way. I wished it did, so others would never feel that pain and it would stop with me. It would make it easier to live with.

 

[Ron H]

Yeah, was one who was pretty lax one way or the other having kids; but my wife had her plans. Best thing that happened and how fast they grew up. While I made sure I was home on special occasions, birthdays, graduations, etc. I also missed some as I traveled a bunch for work several years. The get ahead and successful thing climbing da ladder that have deep regrets about what bullshit it was with corporate political backstabbing. Made good money and provided well for the family, built a nice home. Included putting our kids in nice schools, helping with college and home down payments. They’re just the most important part of our lives. Seeing your kids set themselves up in life and not needing their parents to live on is a comfy feeling.

Conversely, the cycle of life. My folks were fantastic. Dad was one of those handy guys who could do most anything. Restored my 1st car with his help and wisdom. Mom couldn’t ever do enough for us and loved being grandma. Any chance she got, she wanted to play grandma, even when she was still working FT.

Father time rolled on as my folks could do less and less. At that time, I had my own biz and could often set my schedule. I’d visit them often taking my mom shopping, fixing stuff around their place – things my dad did as he taught me, as he’d watch me do things he couldn’t do anymore. It really was hard for him; but hid it well. It was nice when I could call him for advice as he was still sharp. Probably have a 100 times since he passed where I could a used his help. As I’m finding my limitations slowly expand I know how he must have felt. They’d thank me repeatedly for helping them and I’d say this is just payback for all you’ve done and can’t ever get even with all you did. NO thanks are necessary. It is a nice feeling that I was there to help out as they had to pass on. As posted, some have or had a much tougher time with this than I did having to care for their folks, take them in…was spared this.

 

[70ChargerBP]

I have 4 kids, 2 girls 16 and 9, 2 boys 14 and 7. Every stage has its challenges and rewards. It’s not easy by any means if you really try to be invested in your kids and try to involve them in your church, school or community. But for me it’s been extremely rewarding… mostly

Besides, where else are you going to get free farm labor?

 

[67SniperHockey]

Being a parent is the best - are there challenges, sure. I'm pretty self aware and try to soak up as many moments as often as I can. My kids are 12 and 9 and one thing is for certain; time is a thief.

 

[Nxcoupe]

I have a 17 yo beautiful, smart, athletic daughter. She runs track, hurdles specifically and consistantly improves and ranks in top 5 if she doesn't win. National honor society, etc. Boys. She gets quite a lot of attention from them but she has stuck with one for 2 years now.
I wish I could reset back to 2 yo, and start over, never regret once having her. She popped up after we had filed for divorce. Guess God wanted to give me a chance to be a dad, Lord knows I wanted to. She came along very late in my life.
To sum it up, she has made me a much better person. She is a daddy's girl and I guess she always will be. I stress family first and encourage her to excell in all she does. She is a great kid. Love her to death. I'm lucky I guess.
Thanks to everyone for sharing your experiences, this thread is a great read.

 

[Cojohnso1]

Most users here in car sites are men. I would love to hear a woman's perspective. Because I have to be honest with myself and ask. If I had the burden of carrying then delivering a child? Would I be as pro children? I have joked before if men had the children? There would be ALOT of one child family's. We typically won't do that again. Lol.

 

[Pops1967GTX]

 

[gtx6970]

1) If you wait until you are "ready" to have kids, you'll never have them.
2) There is nothing anyone can tell you that will properly prepare you for having kids.
3) Its better for some people not to reproduce.
4) If you don't have kids. you'll miss out on one of life's most important journeys
5) Being a parent can really suck sometimes; it can also be incredibly rewarding.

Truth ^^^^



My girls were neither planned or ever said I didnt want kids.

But I have 2 daughters ( 23 and 26 ) that mean more than the world to me.

They are good kids and for the most part always have been ( no ones perfect ) Drink very little, no drama and dont do drugs .
Are they perfect,,,hell no.

But mess with them or do them wrong and they will never find your body.

 

[copper67sat]

We never had children. We got married out of college and moved 1200 miles away from family due to my job so we were busy learning how to be married adults on our own with little help or influence from family - good or bad. My wife was the 2nd of 4 kids born in less than 4 years and the oldest girl in her family. Her older brother is disabled so she was sort of the oldest child. She ended up taking care of her siblings a lot so she felt like she had already raised a family and never felt strongly about having kids of her own.

We got close to starting a family in our early/mid 30's and then my wife was diagnosed with some health issues that put kids on the back burner. By the time it was resolved, we were turning 40 and decided our time had passed. For myself, I think I would have enjoyed fatherhood, but our lives would have been very different and we are happy where we are so no real regrets.

We spoil our nieces and nephews and friend's kids instead, then send them back to mom and dad lol.