I was at an ATM yesterday and a little old lady asked if I could help her check her balance,
so I pushed her over.
so I pushed her over.
Thought For the day!
- Thread starter Richard Cranium
- Start date
Who told you that joke...Too Hung Lo
The Rebel
Well-Known Member
His brother, Who Flung Dung..
The Rebel
Well-Known Member
To quote the famous Henny Youngman..
A guy complains of a headache. Another guy says, Do what I do. I put my head on my wife's bosom, and the headache goes away. The next day, the man says, Did you do what I told you to? Yes, I sure did. By the way, you have a nice house!
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.
My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.
I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays.
I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.
I've got all the money I'll ever need, if I die by four o'clock.
If at first you don't succeed... so much for skydiving.
If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.
When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my X-rays.
A guy complains of a headache. Another guy says, Do what I do. I put my head on my wife's bosom, and the headache goes away. The next day, the man says, Did you do what I told you to? Yes, I sure did. By the way, you have a nice house!
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.
My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.
I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays.
I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.
I've got all the money I'll ever need, if I die by four o'clock.
If at first you don't succeed... so much for skydiving.
If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.
When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my X-rays.
jason79
Well-Known Member
Two old ladies were sitting on a park bench. A flasher came up and opened his coat. The one old lady had a stroke, the other couldn't reach.
Robndi43
Active Member
That was frickin hilarious. I was sitting in the ER waiting room when I read it. Thought they were going to ask me to leave.
Confucius say: Man with dick in cash register must be coming into money.
Confucius also say: Man with with dick in cookie jar must be fuckin' crackers.
Confucius also say: Woman sitting on Judge's knee might have honourable discharge.
Confucius also say: Man with with dick in cookie jar must be fuckin' crackers.
Confucius also say: Woman sitting on Judge's knee might have honourable discharge.
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Confucius say - Woman who fly airplane upside down will have nasty crack up!
Speed kills, buy a Chevy and live forever!
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Confucius say woman who cooks potatoes and peas in same pot very unhygienic. 
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