What would you Do/Say?

[eagleone1983]

After reading Cranky's thread about his current home situation it got me thinking about mine. My wife and I just recently had another baby, a boy and that makes a boy and girl and I'm done. Planning on getting fixed in a couple months. We've been married almost 9 years which I think in today's world is considered an eternity and almost non-existent. I'm 33 she's 29 and for the most part we get along really well but lately things have been crazy. She just flips her lid for no reason and I know most of it has to do with her hormones being jacked because of the pregnancy.

Yesterday I start the Roadrunner to head to a luncheon for work (I took the day off but still wanted to go the luncheon since my boss flew in from Texas). She makes it a point to run out to the garage and say "Why do you get to take the Roadrunner when ever you want?" I looked at her dumbfounded. I responded with I can take it when ever I want and was on my way.

So in the past I have told her no when she's said she's taking the Roadrunner out. It wasn't that I don't want her to drive it, it's the places she's said she was taking it. Once she said, "I'm taking the RR out with Amy for a girls night." The F you are, you aren't parking that thing at some club nor are you having your friends messing around in the car. The other is she wanted to take it to work but her parking lot is tiny and I just don't trust it there. She's taken it to work before and it ended up getting rained on with the windows down so you can see my lack of trust has merit. Any way am I in the wrong? Should she be able to take it when/where ever she wants to? I put all my time/sweat/blood whatever you want to call it into that car, I'm protective of it. It's kind of hard not to be but I also don't want it to be a source of arguments because after all it's just a car.

 

[BeeKool]

Damned if you do, Damned if you don't.

 

[eagleone1983]

yeah, I'm just going to chalk it up to a new baby and my Mom was in town. So the whole in-law = I'm gonna be pissed at everything factor cause I have seriously not said a thing in over a year about her not taking the car out as long as she tells me, which I think is fair.

 

[moparnation74]

I have been married for 17 years....It is all about compromise and just learning not to add fuel when they are fired up...Just listen....

As far as driving my rides she can barely reach the pedals, lol Advantage of owning B bodies.....

She is just hormone raging bro....Let it slide and ignore it. No matter how much you want to snip back just bite the tongue and move on.

 

[Mike67]

...and thats why I built my wifes car first! There is no rationale that will ever be able to explain thier thought process...its just a fact of life.
Ive had to question some of my wifes destinations as well....She wanted to take her Mustang to the mall with a friend...and when i questioned the logic in taking a classic car to a mall parking lot, leaving it for God knows how long, was immidately construed as I didnt trust HER...then it was on...All of my positions were attacked like I was an enemy...None of my explanations were adequate to cease the bombardment of assumptions and what ifs..
Ive been married for 15 years (47 & 43) have 2 girls 10 & 14, and have quietley made mental notes of thier quirks, causes & mood changes...the one thing that I have learned that any question, comment or concern regardless of the issue or magnitude is that they are inherently crazy as hell! For some reason they are always defensive, they ( friends, daughters, moms, grand moms, aunts & women you don't even know) will come together like a heard of cape buffalo protecting thier young regardless... they will try to trample the very life out of those that question them...
I hope she never gets into my account!!!!

 

[super-bee_ski]

I'm so sorry guys, but I just do not understand the "airing" or "venting" of personal issues on this forum!

Sorry eagleone1983 and the rest of you.....
I just do not understand it.
Being a 20 year US Veteran and 17 years working for the Dept. Of Defense, I have always thought "this kind of stuff" was best left amongst "private friends" and not on Social Media.
BUT: That is just my opinion.

I will say this eagleone1983, she is perhaps your best friend ever...try to understand the stress she is dealing with.

 

[MarPar]

and to answer your question, NO, you are NOT in the wrong.

 

[1967coronet440]

 

[BeeKool]

I'm so sorry guys, but I just do not understand the "airing" or "venting" of personal issues on this forum!

Sorry eagleone1983 and the rest of you.....
I just do not understand it.
Being a 20 year US Veteran and 17 years working for the Dept. Of Defense, I have always thought "this kind of stuff" was best left amongst "private friends" and not on Social Media.
BUT: That is just my opinion.

I will say this eagleone1983, she is perhaps your best friend ever...try to understand the stress she is dealing with.

It's not as though they are sharing their most private thoughts with us. Maybe just find it nice knowing that we all go through similar BS is good. Personally, having a vent is better than keeping it all bottled up forever.
People like myself haven't anybody to vent to, lest word get back to she devil and then it be on like donkey Kong.
This is the one place where I know I can be both semi-anonymous and understood at the same time.
Anytime I vent to my brother, or one of my friends it somehow gets back to her and then we fight. Always over money, I have it, she doesnt. Makes me question the loyalty of certain individuals around me.
I don't question the loyalty of my fellow mopes. Nothing is to be gained or lost by simply giving advice.

However, anybody going through a divorce should watch their posts, here and anywhere else.

 

[1967coronet440]

Best thing to do is get her involved, oil changes, maintenance etc... she will learn to appreciate it (assuming she doesn't by the comments made in your opening statement about taking it to girls night) I told my ol lady she's changing the oil on the SRT this weekend, its a start I guess...

 

[PurpleBeeper]

I like the idea of builder her a car too.........318 2bbl. auto '69 RR clone?

 

[Richard Cranium]

 

[Mike67]

Its just common issues... asking for perspective from others that may have already been there done that...may be able to give insight to help, be it on a car, financials, wives or insurance or whatever..I think thats what makes this site so cool...you have all of these different life expirences from many different generations, lifestyles, and expertise to poll from...

 

[Moparsmitty]

BeeKool is right. I totally understand wanting to vent when you are going through a tough time and posting here may seem pretty harmless but I can see where there's a very remote possibility that it could come back to bite you in the ***. Stranger things have happened. Anything posted here or anywhere else on the internet is forever and while it's probably anonymous enough that nobody will find it you've got to be careful what you say, write or post. I'm no lawyer (thank god) but a situation like this could end up in court some day so you have to do what you can to protect yourself. Good luck.

 

[wagonman]

Manual steering and brakes cured my Gal of ever wanting to drive it again.

 

[vintage chromoly]

No way in hell would my wife be driving my car to someplace that it was going to.be left unattended.
I don't park my car and leave it.
My wife wouldn't want to drive the old car anyway. She has zero interest in drag racing, car culture etc....
I like to keep the worlds seperate.

We have activities we enjoy together, but old Mopars isn't one of them and that's perfect in my mind.

 

[super-bee_ski]

It's not as though they are sharing their most private thoughts with us. Maybe just find it nice knowing that we all go through similar BS is good. Personally, having a vent is better than keeping it all bottled up forever.
People like myself haven't anybody to vent to, lest word get back to she devil and then it be on like donkey Kong.
This is the one place where I know I can be both semi-anonymous and understood at the same time.
Anytime I vent to my brother, or one of my friends it somehow gets back to her and then we fight. Always over money, I have it, she doesnt. Makes me question the loyalty of certain individuals around me.
I don't question the loyalty of my fellow mopes. Nothing is to be gained or lost by simply giving advice.

However, anybody going through a divorce should watch their posts, here and anywhere else.

Really Be Kool?
Talking about Marital discord is pretty personal to me!
Ha Ha!
Yeah, that's quite personal to me

But it's a different generation now!

 

[44070dart]

Hell no, I like reading this stuff.. so I know my wife of 40 years isn't the only woman without common sense out there .. give her the car and tell her she can take it for a cruise with her friends but don't park it where it will be damaged, as your hard work and $$$$$ is in it ..if she is like mine the $$$$ part will get through her skull

 

[streetwedg]

Been Maried 31 years. The Road Runner can always be replaced. Can your wife?

 

[Mr. Belvedere II]

I've never let anyone drive my car, and that includes my wife. I just don't think I could handle it. She doesn't want to anyway because she knows the blood sweat and tears and money that I've poured into it and wouldn't want to be responsible should anything happen. She loves the car and loves to be with me in it but she understands that it is just something that can only be operated by me. Besides, my car is always needing some kind of attention mechanically electrically or otherwise its just not so reliable that I could trust anyone without the intimate knowledge of every little circuit to take her. Just today on my way into work the electric fan for some reason didn't kick on when I hit the switch as I sat in traffic. The temp began to rise and I knew I was heading for an overheat. I had to get out in traffic at a light and fiddle the wires until it kicked on. Would anyone else have been knowledgable enough to do that before my engine suffered total thermal breakdown? Not likely. That is why I can't let anyone drive her. Too high maintenance and not reliable like modern cars. These are antiques we are talking about, older than both of us, and we have invested a lot in keeping them roadworthy. Hopefully there is a way you can express this to her without creating a conflict. Definitely a tough situation. It IS your car though isn't it?