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why did the chicken cross the road?

Stegs

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So why did the chicken cross the road?

SARAH PALIN: The chicken crossed the road because, gosh-darn it, he's a maverick!

BARACK OBAMA: Let me be perfectly clear, if the chickens like their eggs they can keep their eggs. No chicken will be required to cross the road to surrender her eggs. Period.

JOHN McCAIN: My friends, the chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON: What difference at this point does it make why the chicken crossed the road?

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or against us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken.

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.... and the road.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white?

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he is acting by not taking on his current problems before adding any new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross the road so badly. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a NEW CAR so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

ANDERSON COOPER: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way the chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

DONALD TRUMP: We should build a wall so the chicken can't cross the road.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2016, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2016. This new platform is much more stable and will never reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

Adele: To say hello from the other side
 
To get to Leaping Donkey Farm where all of the other chickens have also crossed the road into poultry Heaven on Earth.

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That was real imaginative! Lol

Why did the chicken only go halfway across the road?

He wanted to "Lay it on the Line"! Ta Dum
 
I think they missed a couple.

Obama-- I didn't know it crossed the road but if it did, it was Bush's fault.

Bill Clinton-- Depends on what your definition of "cross" is.

Algore-- To escape the rising water caused by global warming

Grandpa-- In my day the chickens didn't cross the road, we had to carry them. Mostly at night, 15 at a time, in the snow, barefoot and it was uphill both ways.
 
ISIS: The chicken crossed the road.....because it was afraid. All of our goats abandoned us....
 
Isaac Newton: Chickens at rest tend to stay at rest. Chickens in motion tend to cross roads.
 
Putin: Because in Russia we own the other side of the road

Ellen: Because it wanted to dance, dance, dance

ISIS: Who is this chicken you speak of...kill the infidel

Trump: As long as its an American chicken, I don't have a problem with this chicken

Chris Christie: mmmmm chicken

Trump: That's what the media wants you to believe but it isn't true. Look, the chicken is a good friend of mine and...

Trump: Two words...Megyn Kelly!
 
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Why did the chicken cross the road?

DOT: To prove that it could be done.
NSA: To avoid our eavesdropping program that doesn't exist.
CIA: We don't follow chickens.
FBI: To provoke us by possibly crossing a state line.
GCHQ: That sounds like a Yank (American) chicken. Ask them.
KGB: To spy on us.
Mossad: Why are you asking us?
 
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